I went and had lunch alone at a cheap Italian place. When I told my coworker, he was flabbergasted that I had eaten by myself at a restaurant. He kept asking if it was awkward, etc. How is it awkward to go out and eat by yourself? I don't get it.
Really depends on the restaurant. The more casual it is, the more acceptable, I think. It'd be a little weird to see someone getting a 7 course meal with wine pairings alone, but a dude grabbing a burger and a beer at a local bar doesn't even attract a second's notice.
I think it depends on the city more than the restaurant. If you're in New York or Paris or something, you'll see people eating alone all the time. Those cities are flooded with business travelers who often prefer eating to starvation.
If you're out in the suburbs, it's probably less common
edit: (because business travelers in the suburbs prefer to kill themselves through starvation)
I don't know man... I saw this study once that showed an inverse relationship between calories intake and life span. So the less you eat the longer you live.
I live in the suburbs and constantly go out to eat by myself, it's honestly very nice and I've never been treated oddly for it. I also leave at least a 30% tip every time.
Only real problem is that older men will assume I want their company sometimes.
Yup. I traveled all over for a few years. Eating some of the best steaks in America, while charging the bill to a client, was pretty great. It definitely was better than starvation.
Heck I live in NYC and eat alone all the time, I go to bars alone, I go to the park alone, and museums and basically whatever I feel like doing. I don't always have time to wait for friends, life's too short and I make news ones along the way when I'm out by myself. Sometimes a group holds you back from truly enjoying yourself.
That's true, I'm usually eating alone at fast-casual type places. I've noticed getting breakfast alone seems to be more normal, even at nicer places. I can't say I go get expensive dinners alone, just because that's a luxury to me so I only do that with friends.
I actually know somebody that does it at extremely expensive places. His rationale is that he's not going to miss out on an epic once a year meal because he can't convince another person that it will be worth $400 dollars. In fact, once he explained it to me it helped me make sense of the fact that when I was at a two michelin star restaurant there was a guy there eating by himself drinking a shitload of wine and asking the wait staff everything they knew.
You'd be surprised, lots of business travelers eat fancy alone, they are used to it. I used to travel a lot, I didn't eat fancy every meal, but I did occasionally.
My job had me traveling alone for a while with a certain amount of money each day for meals so I'd go out to restaurants every night. It only takes 1-2 times out to get over the stigma of dining alone, especially once you realize no one else gives a shit except you.
I read an article before that you actually get better service and extras as a single person eating in a high end prix fix restaurant. The rationale is that you're really there for the food so they pay more attention to you and/or provide extra courses.
One time I got stood up by a tinder date at one of my favorite restaurants. It's pretty small so I didn't want to inconvenience the owner by cancelling. Went it, had at least 5-6 (small) dishes with appropriate sake pairings and went home. Always wanted to get stood up at least once to see how I'd react. I think I nailed it. Would bang the owner too.
It'd probably be easier if the fancy place has booths, I know I'd be much more comfortable than if I was at a table in the middle of the floor. I'm a little biased though, I'd prefer a booth even if I'm eating with friends.
I've done paired tasting menus at Michelin starred restaurants by myself. Sometimes it's nice to just not have to worry about conversation so you can just enjoy your meal and really concentrate on all the different flavors working together. I usually bring a book to keep me company, but sometimes never end up opening it.
In some ways, it makes more sense than the more casual places to me. The high-end places are usually where the chef is trying to tell you a story through food and has paid painstaking attention to every little detail, so being able to just let the meal speak to you can give you a much better appreciation for the experience. Grabbing a burger and a beer is a more social proposition to me.
I had to go away for work, so on the companies expense I had a 3 course meal in the hotel restaurant by myself... and i mean by myself there was no one else in there
When I'm working abroad I eat out by myself almost always and once I happened to be away for my birthday so I proceeded to go into a fancy restaurant and consume a 75$ meal by myself, I thoroughly enjoyed my huge meal and gave it all the attention it deserved without having to divert the attention toward someone else, it was a really great experience once you get past the visibly uncomfortable waitress and the people giving you weirded out glances while you just gobble away your food with a smile.
That's actually a useful trick at fancy restaurants - especially up and coming ones. Several times while traveling and looking for a good meal I've walked in by myself on a weeknight, without a reservation, and dressed just a little casually for the restaurant in question. The wait staff assumed I was a food critic, set me up at a good table, and occasionally hooked me up with off-menu specialties. The first couple of times I didn't think anything of it, just figured it was normal excellent service, but I've since had several waiters ask what website I write for at the end of the meal.
Unless you're 70 or older....then I'll assume your spouse just died and that's why you're alone. Then I feel sad for you for no reason. That might just be me.
Headphones. Not earbuds but headphones. If they still insist on talking to you when you're clearly not in a position to hear them, there's nothing you could have done
My job feeds me, so now I sit alone to eat 4/5 days of the week. I've gotten so used to it that I don't even blink at the thought of going out for whatever food I want and eating it there by myself. I don't see the big deal anymore, I'm hungry and alone so its time to eat alone. Food doesn't require someone to help you eat.
I work in the Alberta Oil & Gas industry and travel all around the province, usually 20 days out of the month, staying 5-6 days in a one towne at a time. Since I spend a lot of time in hotels alone I frequently eat at restaurants/ bars alone. I've had situations where people have flat out asked me if I was stood up. I don't understand this stigma in the slightest.
My girlfriend is much the same way. Whenever she calls during lunch and I'm out eating somewhere she'll ask who I'm with; when I tell her I'm alone her response is usually some variation of, "Oh, I'm so sorry".
you coworker is probably also someone who hates "awkward" silences and fills them with meaningless bullshit. I think some people just hate being alone with thier own thoughts
Lunch is far more acceptable to the general public for solitary eating than dinner is. Lunch is just something that happens in the middle of the day. Stumbling onto our next meal so we don't starve.
Dinner seems more planned. Especially at a nice place. Plus it's this token dating staple that people go to dinner together.
I do this in school in the cafeteria. I just sit alone, eat and browse Reddit on my phone. People think I have no friends.... And they might be right about that.
Worth it. I've gone to my favorite local bar right after work for a beer and a burger. I'll just enjoy the ability to watch ESPN, check my phone, and get fat. Edit: in public. I do that frequently at home.
Oh my god, it's glorious to find a pretty empty bar on a Sunday in the fall in the US. I'll get there like an hour before football starts, order a drink with lunch and not leave until 7PM.
Eh, I've tried reading a book in a bar. I was interrupted every 5-10 minutes by people going "What?! You're reading a book in a bar?! Fascinating! What's it about? Also, why are you reading in a bar?"
Ebooks. Now you can stare at your phone just like everyone else, but maybe actually improve yourself. Or at least have better entertainment than whatever sportsing is occurring on the tvs.
Seriously, I sit in a pub and read on my phone all the damn time. Oddly more relaxing than doing it at home, cause of the variety of beer I have at my disposal, and the fact I "stay on task" reading and chilling more than at home, so to speak.
When I moved to Phoenix for a few months, I'd take my laptop and my dog to the bar around the corner and get work done. Inevitably I'd end up making friends and getting drunk, but I drafted many an email at that place.
Agree with this. Shortly after moving in to my own apartment after living with room mates for years, I went to a local bar and had lunch and a few drinks on a Saturday by myself. Watched some soccer, talked to the people around me and it was super enjoyable. The hardest part is talking yourself into doing it.
I've been doing this since I turned old enough to drink so I don't really think about it anymore. Can't even remember if it was hard the first time or not.
Yup, I love this too. I travel somewhat frequently for work, and I love having the chance to explore a city on my own. Every night I'll go to a new place for dinner (usually a bar or something similar), eat by myself, talk to whoever I meet there, and generally have a great time. It's amazing how much more you can learn about a place when you're open to meeting new people, not just hanging out with your partner/friends/colleagues/whoever.
Do it! As a former bartender, as long as you are nice and polite you will usually get great service. I loved chatting with the regulars who worked downtown and just wanted a slice of pizza and a beer.
I don't do it often, but this is definitely a great way to spend some time
My last birthday,I went to my favourite pub on my own, early in the afternoon. Just sat in a corner by myself, reading a good book, drinking my favourite cider, put a couple of good songs on the jukebox, it was wonderful. Once it got to about 9pm, and the place started filling up,I was quite drunk, tottered home, picked up a pizza on the way, watched one of my favourite films and fell asleep.
Not saying I'd do that every week, but it was definitely one of the best days I've had in a couple of years
I live in Seoul. I eat at a pub alone all the time.
Well, after about the 5th or 6th time, I knew the bartenders and the other regulars and I was no longer eating alone. That was 4 years ago. I'm never alone now.
every time I eat at a bar alone I end up sparking up a conversation with the bartender or someone else eating or drinking alone. It's my favorite thing to do...
If I'm eating alone (on a business trip, etc) my go to move is going to eat at a bar. When you sit at the bar you always end up meeting some people around you to talk to, or at least the bartender. And if not there's almost always ESPN on TV. Plus beer.
Easy way to find new people to talk to, people are a bit buzzed so always more social.
The first thing I always try to do when I moved to a new town is find a bar with awesome bartenders and a good after work crowd. Becoming a regular has its perks for sure. So dont think going to often is a bad thing.
This. Know exactly no one outside of my coworkers (who are 20+ years older than me), so I've been going to the movies alone, shopping alone, etc. Still not eaten at a bar alone though.
TL;DR~ Going to a bar alone on 4th of July kicked ass.
All my friends were busy 4th of July and I had a little extra money to play with for the first time in a while. So since I live in a small town in Texas, maybe a mile from downtown, I took my bike to the main drag to explore and look for hole in the wall places to chill at.
First stop was a café where the food was downright otherworldly. Best sandwich I've ever had, roast beef and onions caramelized to perfection. I don't even remember what it was called but I had the the most unbelievably delicious and expensive coffee drink ever, and a salad so good, I enjoyed eating the tomatoes for the first time in over a decade.
But I left unsatisfied in quantity, like any good American, so, unlike a good American, I went to a burger place across the street and ordered a giant salad. The spicy vinaigrette wasn't all that great, but it was certainly an experience. The place was alright though, and they were showing football games for both the Women's World Cup and Copa America, so that was fun to watch. After having had my fill of salad, I chatted outside with a dude on a smoke break about the penalty kick by Messi that he missed and left for my next destination.
So I biked back across the street to a bar that had hosted a small rock music festival back in May that makes its own sangria, my favorite drink. Lo and behold, it's happy hour and they're two bucks a pop. So I order and start shooting the shit with the bartender looks like something out of a Sum 41 music video, and it turns out we're both into punk and ska and reeeeaaaaally like Rancid.
So far, I'm having the time of my life getting drunk on my own at four in the afternoon.
So on like my third sangria, the bartender, the other patron at the bar, some really cute girl named Jen, and I all go out to the bar patio to smoke. We're all hanging out drinking, smoking, and listening to the Indestructible album, when I go back inside to get my drink freshened up. Well, when I come back outside there's the guy from the burger place and his friend, so I introduced myself and it turns out burger place guy speaks Spanish as well and suddenly I've made another friend.
And that's how the whole night went. People started trickling in and by the early evening, there were twelve people sitting at like five tables dragged together, including the bartender. That night, I sang Fields of Anthenry at the top of my lungs, got into arguments about Doctor Who and Firefly, flirted, made plans to start a band, and chain smoked four mini cigars.
Simply put, going out to a bar, on my own, in the middle of the afternoon, was the best decision I've ever made.
Seeing a movie on your own is awesome. You get there exactly when you want to, see exactly what you want to see, leave exactly when you want to, and you don't have to have any conversations you don't want to. It's beautiful.
EDIT: Thanks to /u/OHAITHARU for reminding me of the big one: you sit where you want to sit!
EDIT2: I absolutely can believe that my highest-rated comment is about doing something fun regardless of whether you look cool doing it. That's what life is about!
I've started doing this now that I've got a little expendable income and I realize that I love going to the movies, but I hated the hassle of getting a group together to pick a time, arrange rides, select a movie everybody likes, etc. I'm normally a really social guy but after a few movies by myself, I realize that it's awesome. I went and saw Interstellar because I had a few hours in Chicago by myself and I recently went and saw Jurassic World because nobody else was free. Agreed, 10/10 would recommend.
Have you ever gone to a movie alone... and then realized no one else is in the theater? It's like your own private screen. Except when it's a horror flick and then you're totally getting the fear.
The trick is to going on a weekday for the first showing of the day, my theater has an early bird special for $4.50 for a 9 am show, NO ONE EVER GOES , Avengers : Age of Ultron was 10x better without hearing 100 normies munch popcorn simultaneously
I did this for Paranormal Activity 4, say what you will about the franchise but when you're alone in the cinema and it's on a huge screen in front of you it's bloody scary.
Yes! Interstellar was the first movie I watched alone, also, since all of my friends had already watched it and I didn't want them to inadvertently give anything away. I'm thinking of doing the same with Jurassic World.
I wanted to watch interstellar in IMAX, but all my friends said that it was too expensive. I went by myself, and it is no doubt the best cinematic experience I have lived through.
My friends doesn't love the movies as much as I do, or not enough to ahem pay for them at least so I simply got tired of harassing them (and they're probably glad for it too) to go for this and that movie so I just started to go alone.
I started doing this a couple years ago...it has become a habit now and I really don't like going to the movies anymore with other people. It's not like you need to talk to each other during the movie.
Lol. I just saw Ex Machina when I fucking felt like it this last semester of college. Pop that popcorn for me. I am the reason you have a job, and you're damn right I'm getting this entire aisle to myself. Best movie time ever. Something, something procrastinating finals studying.
I like to take it that extra step as well. Weekend matinee or middle of the week late night? You get the whole theater to yourself. It has become my preferred movie viewing experience.
WTF, what was your normal movie experience, am I the only one who drives with the person you go there with? Arrives before the movie? Leave after its over? WTF are you guys just leavng in the middle of it?
Plus, if you're married, going by yourself means the tickets only cost half as much!
My $25 movie experience with wife and kid becomes a $10 experience of my own. The extra $5 is for popcorn. We can never go to the theater without the wife buying outrageously priced, mediocre popcorn.
its honestly pretty great. Super easy to find a seat. you can be in and out of the theater in no time. You dont need to worry about conflicting schedules or anything.
I'm to the point where I only go to the movies alone. The last time I went with other people was a Friday night, we were late because one person was holding it up and we got shitty seats.
Give me Sunday at 11am (or a weekday if I can swing it) by myself and I'm set. I don't even understand why seeing movies is a big social event anyway. You're getting together to sit next to someone in the dark and you're not supposed to talk.
There's nothing worse than going to a movie with a friend or partner, thoroughly enjoying it, having an emotional response to it, having it change your point of view, and then hearing your companion go "Well that was a giant piece of shit." It's the only reason I tend to see movies alone. It's not like I'm saying that my taste in movies is better than anyone else's but when you get lost in a good movie and you can feel your companion shifting around in their seat or hear them grunting or sighing their way through something you consider to be a masterpiece, it just kind of ruins the moviegoing experience for me. That hour or so after seeing a movie alone is very important to me. It's silent reflection time, no matter what type of movie I just sat through. If I have somebody jamming their opinion down my throat about how boring they thought the movie was it takes me out of the zone.
That happened to me with The Wolverine. I thought it was really good as far as comic book movies go. When it ended, my friend didn't want to wait for the after credits scene because, in his words, "that was like the worst movie ever." I don't think I've seen a movie with him since.
I think it kind of depends on the movie, at least for me. If it's a comedy or action movie, I'd definitely prefer to see it with someone (or at the very least a crowded theater). The audience reaction (or your friend's reaction) makes it that much more enjoyable.
When it comes to thrillers or good dramatic films, I totally get you. I don't need people making random comments when I'm totally into the movie. That is more of a solitary experience.
Agreed. Just did it for the first time last night (Jurassic World was fucking awesome) and really enjoyed myself. I got to sit exactly where I wanted and just got to focus entirely on the movie. No girl to distract me, no friends making shitty jokes in my ear the entire time, and no family members.
10/10, am going to do it again this weekend for Ant-Man
Especially with reserved seating. You don't need to stand in line or sit there for 20+ minutes by yourself killing time on your phone or whatever. Just show up as the pre movie ads are starting and you're golden.
I remember with Dark Knight Rises, I had a day off so went opening Friday. Because of traffic got there just as the IMAX logo was showing. There was one seat left, mine, right in the prime middle, because I'd reserved my seat days earlier.
About 2 weeks after Age of Ultron came out I went to the theater to see it mid-afternoon on a Wednesday. Completely alone. Theater was empty except for me. It's amazing.
You're obviously going to the movies with the wrong people. (That sounds aggressive. I'm sure you can enjoy a movie fine on your own.) I've never really gone to a movie at a time I didn't want to, or saw one I didn't want to, or sat where I didn't want to (except for the time my friends wanted to see Iron man 2 at midnight and no one wanted to go into the threater and we got shitty shit seats because of it). Plus having the conversation you want to have is beautiful! Then you get to talk about the movie afterwards
Maybe it's because I'm an only child so I learned to be okay with my own company, but I'm always shocked that people find doing things alone to be so strange. I'm far from being a loner, I have friends and am in a great relationship, but I usually prefer to do things by myself.
I love my alone time. I almost prefer to travel and go out alone, and I'm female, which makes it extra weird for some people. Just because I'm sitting at a bar, eating alone doesn't make me a sad cat lady or looking to get laid.
Sporting events can be awesome by yourself. Being someone who likes to get there early and watching players warmup, you don't have to worry about being late. You also can get a ticket for the price and seat that you want and not have to worry about people flaking or not liking your seat choice.
Solo baseball is one of life's lesser appreciated pleasures. I'm a foreigner who loves, loves, loves baseball, and i've almost exclusively dated other foreigners in the last four years, none of whom 'get' it. I'd way rather look 'weird' to someone than not enjoy a game when my partner is like "i'm bo~~~~~red"
It's more eating in public alone, is for whatever reason, considered weird. I do it all the time, I got over the 'shame' of it pretty quickly. Nothing makes you forget what others think of you more than enjoying a beautiful steak in peace and quiet.
Honestly, I find that it is a lot easier to plan a trip or an outing alone than with friends or family. In the past few months, I've gone down to 7 baseball games and an art museum all on my own in a nearby major city, and I have had a huge blast. When I go out with friends or family to events like this, I have to either follow their rules or follow what they want to do.
Again, it's just so much easier to go out and plan activities for yourself than with family or friends. You get to figure out what you like and/or don't like, and it can be relaxing and fun to do in the process.
Ignore them. Once you stop giving off that guilty "oh shit I'm alone" look they prob won't pay attention. I can see that look from a mile away even when people are in booths.
Oh sweet baby Jesus I LOVE eating out alone! For pretty much the same reasons /u/senatorskeletor listed. I picked whatever I want to eat, I can splurge since it's just myself, and I can read a book or just enjoy the company of myself without anyone bothering me.
I rarely do stuff with other people. I didn't realize people thought it was an issue until recently, and I still don't understand why. Nobody cares, nobody looks at you like you're a sad loner or whatever. Plus, it's actually fun and in some cases much better than with a group (ie: movies)
One day I just wanted to get out of the house so I went to a movie theatre and watched GI Joe by myself. The movie was fucking awful but the experience of being by myself was nice.
So much this. I wanted ramen and went to my favorite spot. It's always a bit crowded there on the weekends, but the waiter said about 15 minutes or so. It ended up being 30 minutes, but when they said my name, party of one, I could hear the family next to me gasp and the mother even saying, "That's so sad!" Fuck you, you're the only one making me feel bad you asshole.
Another place, I was eating alone and ordered a beer with my food. It was about 2pm. And the waitress gave me a surprised funny look. I miss big cities where no one gives a fuck. :(
This. I travel for work and I'm almost always alone. I go out to eat alone multiple times a week, I've been to baseball games and movies and concerts alone. I do touristy things alone all the time. Im getting paid to see the world!
Then I come home and my friends will sit in the car and wait for me to get to the mall because its "weird" to walk around the mall alone. It's hard some weeks to switch gears and start doing things with people again.
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u/greenpineapple Jul 13 '15
Doing things alone. For example: eating in public alone, seeing a movie on your own and so on.