Really depends on the restaurant. The more casual it is, the more acceptable, I think. It'd be a little weird to see someone getting a 7 course meal with wine pairings alone, but a dude grabbing a burger and a beer at a local bar doesn't even attract a second's notice.
I think it depends on the city more than the restaurant. If you're in New York or Paris or something, you'll see people eating alone all the time. Those cities are flooded with business travelers who often prefer eating to starvation.
If you're out in the suburbs, it's probably less common
edit: (because business travelers in the suburbs prefer to kill themselves through starvation)
I don't know man... I saw this study once that showed an inverse relationship between calories intake and life span. So the less you eat the longer you live.
I live in the suburbs and constantly go out to eat by myself, it's honestly very nice and I've never been treated oddly for it. I also leave at least a 30% tip every time.
Only real problem is that older men will assume I want their company sometimes.
Yup. I traveled all over for a few years. Eating some of the best steaks in America, while charging the bill to a client, was pretty great. It definitely was better than starvation.
Heck I live in NYC and eat alone all the time, I go to bars alone, I go to the park alone, and museums and basically whatever I feel like doing. I don't always have time to wait for friends, life's too short and I make news ones along the way when I'm out by myself. Sometimes a group holds you back from truly enjoying yourself.
This. I have traveled for work and never had any issues when I have eaten at a restaurant by myself. Now granted I usually will let the waiter know that I am in town for business and then ask what are their specialties. This usually warms up the situation and gets me pretty good service and good suggestions.
I agree. I'm an American in Tokyo for the summer, and it's really common to eat alone here. No one bats an eye really. Only at certain places is it hard, but if they have a counter, its the best because you'll get to eat faster than couples and groups.
Even here in Vancouver, which isn't a huge metropolis, it is still totally normal to see people done alone. Usually I see people with a book or something to entertain themselves.
That's true, I'm usually eating alone at fast-casual type places. I've noticed getting breakfast alone seems to be more normal, even at nicer places. I can't say I go get expensive dinners alone, just because that's a luxury to me so I only do that with friends.
I actually know somebody that does it at extremely expensive places. His rationale is that he's not going to miss out on an epic once a year meal because he can't convince another person that it will be worth $400 dollars. In fact, once he explained it to me it helped me make sense of the fact that when I was at a two michelin star restaurant there was a guy there eating by himself drinking a shitload of wine and asking the wait staff everything they knew.
i do that for all you can eat sushi place. i don't like rolls (too much rice, too fulfilling) while others tend to like rolls. rolls come in an order of 4/6, so there's always leftover that i have to eat too. i'm often laughed at when ordering a lot of food too, so i tend to only order a bit less than i'd like.
so i often eat alone just so that i can order to my heart's content without rolls, without being judged for eating too much (though the servers tend to force me to stop or reduce my orders).
You'd be surprised, lots of business travelers eat fancy alone, they are used to it. I used to travel a lot, I didn't eat fancy every meal, but I did occasionally.
My job had me traveling alone for a while with a certain amount of money each day for meals so I'd go out to restaurants every night. It only takes 1-2 times out to get over the stigma of dining alone, especially once you realize no one else gives a shit except you.
I read an article before that you actually get better service and extras as a single person eating in a high end prix fix restaurant. The rationale is that you're really there for the food so they pay more attention to you and/or provide extra courses.
One time I got stood up by a tinder date at one of my favorite restaurants. It's pretty small so I didn't want to inconvenience the owner by cancelling. Went it, had at least 5-6 (small) dishes with appropriate sake pairings and went home. Always wanted to get stood up at least once to see how I'd react. I think I nailed it. Would bang the owner too.
It'd probably be easier if the fancy place has booths, I know I'd be much more comfortable than if I was at a table in the middle of the floor. I'm a little biased though, I'd prefer a booth even if I'm eating with friends.
I've done paired tasting menus at Michelin starred restaurants by myself. Sometimes it's nice to just not have to worry about conversation so you can just enjoy your meal and really concentrate on all the different flavors working together. I usually bring a book to keep me company, but sometimes never end up opening it.
In some ways, it makes more sense than the more casual places to me. The high-end places are usually where the chef is trying to tell you a story through food and has paid painstaking attention to every little detail, so being able to just let the meal speak to you can give you a much better appreciation for the experience. Grabbing a burger and a beer is a more social proposition to me.
I had to go away for work, so on the companies expense I had a 3 course meal in the hotel restaurant by myself... and i mean by myself there was no one else in there
When I'm working abroad I eat out by myself almost always and once I happened to be away for my birthday so I proceeded to go into a fancy restaurant and consume a 75$ meal by myself, I thoroughly enjoyed my huge meal and gave it all the attention it deserved without having to divert the attention toward someone else, it was a really great experience once you get past the visibly uncomfortable waitress and the people giving you weirded out glances while you just gobble away your food with a smile.
That's actually a useful trick at fancy restaurants - especially up and coming ones. Several times while traveling and looking for a good meal I've walked in by myself on a weeknight, without a reservation, and dressed just a little casually for the restaurant in question. The wait staff assumed I was a food critic, set me up at a good table, and occasionally hooked me up with off-menu specialties. The first couple of times I didn't think anything of it, just figured it was normal excellent service, but I've since had several waiters ask what website I write for at the end of the meal.
Unless you're 70 or older....then I'll assume your spouse just died and that's why you're alone. Then I feel sad for you for no reason. That might just be me.
I once noticed a girl eating by herself at a two Michelin star restaurant. I eat by myself all the time, but I would never think to go alone to a place with a $200 tasting menu.
I ate alone at one of emeril's restaurants in New Orleans, while on business travel. I made a reservation for one, put a tie on, and got the 6 course meal with wine pairing. Truffles just got in season and I was the first to order them that year. The chef actually greeted me at my table with a whole truffle. Truffles are super rich and each course only had shavings from the mushroom. I ended up spending a week's worth of per diem in one night for that meal!
It was a wonderful dinner by myself. At the time I traveled a lot and always ate alone. So, it was not unusual or ackward for me at all.
I had an older guy come into our restaurant and had a 4 course meal and over a half bottle of wine just chillin by himself. I sat and talked to him a bit but he was just hanging out treating himself on a Friday night. I think its completely normal.
I did that exactly (7 course with wine pairings) at wd~50 in New York before they closed. I couldn't get anyone to cough up the money to go with me and sat at the bar, although they had reserved a table for me. The servers guessed (correctly) that I was in the restaurant industry and kept my glasses full all night & chatted me up ;)
Didn't feel weird at all, but I am someone who frequently and happily eats at more casual restaurants alone.
I hate when someone goes to do something alone and spends the entire time on their phone talking. I've seen it many, many times. That does not count and you're obnoxious.
I was an intern in Philadelphia a few years ago and knew no one in the city, I'd have every Monday off so I started "posh lunch Mondays" going to all the fancy places in town and having the lunch special on my own. It was great, staff were nicer, you got your food quicker, and since it was a quiet day for business I always got a great table.
Oh, no, not at all. I'm 42 and spent about ten years of my life in relationships. I've been engaged twice. But I've also spent many years single and I am right now. I don't know if I'll get into another relationship. If it happens, it happens.
Anyhow, I go anywhere and everywhere by myself. Hole-in-the-wall ethnic places to nice restaurants.
If anything, the nice restaurants are easy to dine solo at. Many times, I've been able to skip lines because they have a small table for one or two open, while those in parties have to wait. I don't do anything special for this. I go in with a smile and make a little friendly small talk with the person up front. Ask if they've been busy and tell them that they're doing a good job if they say yes.
One person is easy on the waitstaff. I don't ask for substitutions or special orders and never send stuff back. I want my water refilled a few times, but that's no big deal. Then I leave at least 20%.
From what I can tell, the restaurants like this just fine. After I've gone somewhere three or four times, they usually remember me and some places ask if I want the same thing and know what I like. (Hey, I'm predictable.) I don't think that would happen if I was being a pain in the ass.
Also depends on culture. South Koreans (based on my trip there and also from asking Koreans) seem to be particularly uncomfortable about eating alone and will always try to eat in groups. A lot of restaurants as well will have certain dishes that are for a minimum of two people. I love eating alone and didn't really like the stares and look of confusion on waitstaff's faces when I said I'd be eating alone.
You need to see the episode of Friends where Joey eats everyone's food at Phoebes party because they left. That is essentially what happens when the food arrives.
I went out the other day for breakfast at a popular sit down breakfast place in the area. And by popular I mean 20-40 minute wait usually. They call out for parties when the tables are ready. There was some dude in his 40s who waited a while. It was weird to hear the hostess call out "That guy, party of one." Don't think I could ever do that. He looked like a weirdo. Breakfast made it seem extra weird for some reason. To each their own, but for me, at a restaurant I usually need it to be bar seating or 1/2 empty if I get a table. I don't want to look like a weirdo! I'll take the mumu!
This is typically how I eat out, I'll roll up to a bar and get some food, I'm kind of an introvert so if there's no one there I like no problem but if I run into some friends there that works too.
I think it depends on the time as well. A person eating alone at 1pm on a weekday is just someone on their lunch break from work. Totally acceptable (depending on the restaurant as you said). A person eating alone on a weekday at 6:30 is just someone too tired to cook after a long day at work. Totally acceptable (again depending on the restaurant). A person eating alone on a Saturday night is a loner that can't get a date/friends and doesn't have anything better to do. Looooserrrr
I find the main problem with dining alone is that the wait-staff feel like they have to make small talk with you which is the opposite of the reason you are dining alone to start with.
Back when I was single, I often dined alone at fancy restaurants because all my friends complained it was too expensive. I was actually treated very nicely by the staff and usually got to sit at the bar and/or close to the kitchen, which made it even more entertaining. I still do it from time to time.
Nah man. I prefer to eat at nice restaurants alone. I don't have to chit chat and I can focus on enjoying my food. I can eat at whatever pace I like, order my own appetizers and really enjoy the food.
Actually I really like going to really good restaurants alone. No way of saying this without sounding either pretentious, obsessive or both, but sometimes I really just want to focus on enjoying the food (and wine/other drinks) rather than being social.
I agree - the fancier the restaurant, the more awkward. I eat out alone all the time on business trips. It's fine mostly. But I went to a high-end steak house once by myself, before rush time. All alone eating a nice steak was... sad.
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u/tughdffvdlfhegl Jul 13 '15
Really depends on the restaurant. The more casual it is, the more acceptable, I think. It'd be a little weird to see someone getting a 7 course meal with wine pairings alone, but a dude grabbing a burger and a beer at a local bar doesn't even attract a second's notice.