so me and my boyfriend were dirty talking im a virgin my boyfriend isnt i said i was scared to have sex with him for the first time (we’ve never had sex) and he said why i said because i don’t know how it would feel and i was scared of what it would be like and he said “well you would kind of know what it feels like right? but it will be much better with me” i was confused by that i thought he meant me fingering myself ??😭 so i asked him what does he mean and he said no no forget it like he said something he shouldn’t have that made me more confused and feel weird he said “it was about you knowing how sex would feel because of your past” i’ve never had sex before i was starting to think he was talking about my rape and i was scared that it was about that but i played dumb just in case it wasnt that and i was being stupid i didnt want it to be that but it was he said “you’ve been raped so you’ve had a dick inside you that’s sex intercourse is sex wanted or not” i’m confused about it i don’t know what to make of the situation or what to do he knew he said something wrong after he said it because he immediately said sorry and he knew i would get upset after he said it i’ve had a lot of unwanted sexual stuff done to me mostly when i was a child and he knows this i’ve told him about it i was raped when i was 5 by a much older man i didn’t even know what sex was ? i was raped 4 times and it just feels like a slap in the face he would say that knowing how much i’ve cried to him about it and told him how gross i feel because of it i didn’t want to talk to him anymore but he kept talking he was making it worse everything that came out of his mouth made it worse the next morning he said he didn’t want to talk to me and i was confused i said what did i do wrong and he said “hell what did i do wrong” (this was all on text by the way) i said oh okay i was hurt i didn’t want to start an argument i took a screenshot of what he said he got angry at that and he asked why i did that and i said i just want to screenshot it and he said im dumb and acting like all this was my fault basically so i don’t know if i just overreacted about it all and he didn’t mean to say anything wrong or what what should i do please help!!

My girlfriend and I have been working on our relationship both through conversations and couples counseling.

One thing we agree on is that we both need physical touch and explicit verbal reconciliation after our fights. The physical touch part was actually her idea, but I quickly realized I need it to. I have complained in our therapy sessions that I am always the one who has to initiate this process, though, and that I resent it. She always makes me come crawling to her to end the fight.

We have only been living together for 3 months. I bought the house and she moved in, even though I told her I wasn’t ready to live together. She gave me an ultimatum: she was moving in or we would break up, so I agreed to live together. Given that dynamic, reconciliation has become even more important—I feel suffocated in my own house without it.

We got into a fight on Tuesday, just before she went to pick up her brother from the airport, and since then she has simply refused to reconcile. She texted me a half apology, but she has been physically avoidant for 3 days now. Even after I asked her if we could please do the thing we’d agree to do after we fight—which is basically a hug, a kiss and an apology/reaffirmation with eye contact—she said no. During this time her and her brother have been with my family, enjoying dinner cruises and presents and being treated with love, but my girlfriend has basically given me the cold shoulder the whole time.

After 3 days of her stonewalling me about a fucking hug I kinda just snapped. I told her that I felt uncomfortable, used, disrespected, and alienated by her behavior, that im tired of always being the bigger person, and that she needed to get out of my house if she wasn’t going to take that one small step to make up with me. I was very mean, and I’m sure this effectively ended our relationship given how objectively awful it was to tell her and her brother to get out of my house. I feel silly for doing this, but I also just feel so used and tired. I feel like I’m ALWAYS the one who has to give in. Is that just part of being in a relationship or am I overreacting?

for some context my boyfriend got me a bottle of perfume for Christmas which i actually love but it’s more about the situation, not that price matters but i ended up spending over $400 on him total for his gifts, so when christmas came i opened my gift and he went on to talk about it first thing he mentioned was that it was $75 which i didn’t care about but i could clearly tell he was lying about it, after that i looked online and actually found out it was under $5 which is fine but him lying about it was off putting, and i also feel the need to mention he makes way more money for me so i know he wasn’t broke . he also talked about how it was special in some way but i was confused on how because the one big thing is its a coconut scented perfume i absolutely HATE coconut and he 100% knows that he also knows exactly what my interests are and what i like so it can’t be that he didn’t know what to buy me. its not about the money or the fact of it being one thing, i am grateful for it because he couldve not gotten me anything. i just feel as if there was no thought put into it, aio or should i bring it up to him? (picture of perfume attached)

So my (m35) kid's (13f) coach (60+m) sends messages on a group chat with her and her mother. I think it's weird and I expressed concern multiple times to my ex to no avail. Well yesterday he texted this on the group chat and I about lost my mind. Called him and screamed about how sick and inappropriate it was. He tried to say it was a joke and he was trying to "show her the color" He's said creepy things in the past but this in the most bold he's gotten. I'm about to report him to the director of the club and make something happen to prevent this perv from being around a bunch of little girls. I just want to make sure I'm not overreacting cause I feel like I want to k*ll him for trying to take advantage of my kif kid.

I (20M) don't post on here hardly ever but wanted to know everyone's opinion on my (20F) live-in girlfriend of almost 2 years' conversations she has with a "longtime online friend". He's a year younger than her and they talk literally all the time, I've told her it makes me uncomfortable some of the things he says to her and she tells me I don't want her to have friends. I work nights and if I come home during my shift to grab something or for whatever reason she'll always be on the phone with him and it makes me feel awful.

We have an open phone type thing between us neither of us care about looking at each other's phones and I've confronted her before about them saying "I love you" to each other (that's just how friends talk), about him wanting to talk to her only when she's vulnerable about our relationship, etc. I took these screenshots of her texts with her permission to show her what I meant and she still says she "doesn't see it" because "he doesn't like me like that, he's just a friend". Am I overreacting to constantly ignoring me and talking to him and this being what he says to her?

Every time my partner's parents visit our home they seem to break something. They once cracked a window frame trying to force the window open when it was locked, man handled 2 kitchen faucets to the point that they're extremely wobbly every time they're used, they somehow loosened our oven door handle so that it falls off every time we pull on it, and they seem to forget to close our exterior door half the time they're coming in and out. After they shower they also always put their wet towels on our wooden furniture in our guest room. This morning my partner was yelling at me to fix the oven door handle because she's tired of dealing with it and it's a nuisance. I responded by telling her that I'm tired of having to fix all the shit her parents break when they come here and that they're a nuisance because of the shit they keep doing when they visit. Did I over react?

Mother-in-law is the most passive aggressive woman I've ever met in my entire life! I truly didn't know what this tournament meant until I met her! I know this wasn't the only gift I got for Christmas… But when I opened it, I didn't honestly know how to react

My husband and I moved when I was 8 months pregnant and I didn't bother unpacking most of my pre pregnancy clothing.

Recently we were out at dinner and we were talking about declutterring our house and he mentioned me just throwing those clothes away because I haven't bothered unpacking them yet. I basically said yeah because I was pregnant and still can't fit in them when I lose the rest of the baby weight I'll unpack the rest. This man said to me "if you haven't lost the weight by now you aren't going to lose it" I am 7 weeks postpartum and have lost 20 of the 30 pounds I have gained. I had a c section I was just cleared to lift anything heavier than my baby a week prior. I told him it was really rude and he said it wasn't because I was back in pre pregnancy clothing by now with our other 2 children. Am I overreacting by being hurt and upset by this comment. Like I might hang on to the weight a bit longer because this round of breastfeeding I'm hungry and thirsty all the time but dang that doesn't mean I won't eventually lose it and not want to trash all of my clothes.

So I(26M) have been dating my girlfriend(29F) for about a year and she’s always had a best friend whom she’s know for years. I’ve never been bothered by him but she mentioned how his humour is sexual and that’s just who he is(never met him), I asked for an example and she gave an example and I asked to see the chat not really expecting anything too crazy , idk it just seems to me like he wants her and calls her princess etc. (The first two pictures)

The last two pictures are a guy she works with and he got her like a ring to wear and then was calling her a ‘cowgirl’? I got pissed about it but she reckons it’s just the way they talk and that he was referring to her music taste etc but I think he was insinuating more.

AIO about these conversations?

i know , i was bombarding him with texts. but we have had this problem in the past . he knows it makes me uncomfortable but every time i bring it up he tells him i’m acting crazy and it’s not a big deal because he loves me. i just feel so disrespected. feels a little pathetic to go to the internet but i just need any form of validation i genuinely feel like im going insane here . thanks

I (28m) have been married to my wife (28f) for 6 years. We've been together for 9. We have two children (2) and (4).

My wife admitted to me a few days ago that she sent boudoir photos from a recent photo shoot to a guy she went to highschool with.

She said she needed someone to tell her she looked pretty and knew he would tell her what she wanted.

These are very intimate photos and literally one of them is her in Doggystyle ass in the air showing almost everything.

I'm ready to end my marriage over this. Am I overreacting?

Think my bf of 3 years has become addicted to gambling this year. He became unemployed in march and went almost all year with no job, relying on sports betting and unemployment to get by. He also has debt and wasn’t getting that off at all. He WAS managing to get by until October, I had to loan him $1000 around Halloween for bills and he promised to get it back to me in 3 weeks because he had a job lined up. He started his job the first week of November. The end of November comes around and I haven’t seen a dime or heard a word so I’m frustrated and we end up fighting about it because he wasn’t being understanding at all. He does up telling me he needed til the end of January.

I ended up folding and accepting it because I know he’s catching up on bills and getting back on his feet and is moving out soon but I’ve had to sit around and watch him place sports bets almost daily since. They’re $10-$20 bets and it adds up. I brought it up today after letting it eat at me because it’s frustrating to see when he owes me money. At first he understood, said he shouldn’t of borrowed from me in the first place and will pay me some tomorrow and work to get it back ASAP but after I mentioned how it’s unfair that he sports bets when he owes me money he got offended and a fight broke out.

I may be being kind of harsh but I’m so fed up and he never understands where I’m coming from instead will just blame me and get defensive. Say things like “why are you with me then”. I’m just so frustrated

Hi.. I posted a while ago, AIO for not talking to him since November 8, I included a screenshot below. I also included evidence where he said he wrote the “Im sorry my name” signs. For context I am 21F and he is 37, and we met on a website called Seeking Arrangements. I know this is a bad thing, and I was in a bad place when I signed up. I deleted the website a while after I met him and we were in an actual relationship, and I am not on it anymore. Today an anonymous phone number texted me which I know is him since he included my dads name, and threatened to show him things I’ve done, which I think is pictures and videos he took of me, some when I wasn’t aware. I am terrified, and I don’t know what to do. I want to report this to the police, but is this an overreaction to him just trying to make me scared? I don’t want him to go to jail because of me. I don’t have anyone I can talk to about this and I don’t know what to do. Please give me advice.. Thank you so much. Screenshot 1-4: Previous post Screenshot 5-6: “I’m sorry” sign proof Screenshot 7-8: Apology Screenshot 9: Anonymous text

EDIT: This has been an overwhelming experience for me posting this. Everyone is telling me that I am not getting the severity and should leave him or tell my mom. I'm going into a downward spiral of thinking that maybe if I gave in to his fantasies earl8, he might not have turned this way. I know it's probably not right to think this. But it keeps coming to my mind all the time I rejected the things he suggested in bed. It's time for me to go home from work now and I feel like a 1000kg stone on my chest.

I'm 26F and he's 27M. This happened when my mom was staying with us for a while. My dad passed away druing covid before I married my husband, so my mother stays with us and my siblings alternatively.

I haven't told my parents or his parents about this yet. But I'm very very angry and shattered.

He says it's normal for guys to have such thoughts about females, even relatives. Idk what to do. He acts like nothing happened.

I know I shouldn't have, but I went through his phone secretly the next day and found a hell lot of a mother-in-law p*rn(some of it non-consensual category).

I have been thinking if I don't satisfy him physically. I am kind of conservative when it comes to all this stuff. He says that because I don't do things he wants me to do he has to look for other outlets. He keeps making a point that he was just watching and didn't do anything.

I work from the office and he works from home so I was scared when I left home this morning.

This is the second time she (23F) has mentioned it.

I’ve been with my (23F) girlfriend (23F) for 6 months now and we spend a lot of time together. We’re young and in love lol.

When I was single, my best friend and I hung out multiple days a week after work and spend most Saturday’s together. Now that I’m in a relationship, we don’t really do that anymore. I make sure I always make plans with my best friend at least once a week and we talk every day. I know it is very different from what it once was, but I feel like this is normal? I get so upset when this topic comes up with friends because I honestly don’t know what they expect. I am building up my life with this person, so yes, I am spending a lot of time with her.

Note, my best friend does have a boyfriend. They live together and have been together for 5 years so I guess they are past the “wanting to spend every moment together” phase.

I would really appreciate any advice you have. Am I overreacting? Is she? Am I an asshole? What the hell do I do?

I was using her phone a couple of nights ago to send myself something through WhatsApp, and I came across the messages between her and a guy she used to be friends with, out of interest I clicked on it

As you can see, at the top of the messages is the date sent “25th april” we got together on the 1st April

I confronted her about this and she said it’s not what it looks like, and he thought they were dating, even though she never said they were, and apparently never wanted to date him.

They stopped being ‘friends’ about 4 months later after something happened at a party they were both out

Some things to note:

She told me he was being creepy and blocked him at the start of our relationship

Apparently she didn’t tell me, Becuase she didn’t know what I would say about it

She lied to me about blocking him “for my own good”

Apparently she was scared of what he would say if she tried to tell him they weren’t together

He also messaged her “happy birthday “ in June, so this was going on for a while

AIO or is this not right? It’s been playing in my head for the past couple of days and I can’t trust her now

Husband slept in because he "woke up in the middle of the night and couldn't get back to bed til pretty late." I stayed up until 3:30 AM prepping for "Christmas magic" ie. cookies and milk, carrots for reindeer, note from Santa, Santa's footprints, wrap presents I had to hide for a while, clean up the mess. This morning when the kids woke up around 7:30 AM, I had tried to wake up my husband by saying "hey! The kids are up. Come down so we can watch them open presents!" Didn't budge. That's where my resentment began to build.

So I did all the presents with the kids and filmed everything on my own. Tried so hard to not snap or take it out on the kids, but my anger was slowly building. By the time husband woke up around 11 am and came downstairs, I was already done with breakfast, feeding kids, kitchen clean up, clean up present-opening-mess, etc. There were periods of time I would snap and raise my voice at the kids. My patience and fuse have been short, mainly in part of my first trimester fatigue, hunger (iykyk), and moodiness. My husband, apparently tired from my yelling, snaps at me and tells me to go upstairs because he doesn't want to hear my yelling anymore.

"Wtf is wrong with you?" he said.

"YOU!" I snapped back. "You're what's wrong! You haven't done shit!".

Then the words that came out of his mouth caused me to cry for the next 3 hours and periodically throughout the day.

"All you did was wrap presents."

All I did was wrap presents.

At that moment, it felt like one of the most hurtful things anyone has ever said to me. I don't know if it's my pregnancy hormones, trying so hard to make Christmas special for my kids (4 and 2 years old), or it's all of the pent up resentment overflowing (or in this case erupting) not just from today, but most days. Maybe it's the feeling of him not pulling his weight. It's the first year where our kids are understanding the magic of Christmas. I never had this as a child and neither did my husband. AIO for still being upset that he said "all you did was wrap presents"?

for context, we’ve been together for almost a year and we decided to do our family holidays separately so we wouldn’t have to go to 3 christmases in one day and it works for us. we had plans tonight for me to pick him up and get drinks with a mutual friend. at dinner, i texted asking if he’d gotten me anything. i already bought his gifts a while ago and gave one to him on christmas eve and was going to give him his nice one tonight before drinks. as you can tell, i’m pretty disappointed and he just made me feel like i’m crazy for being upset. i just feel like this is icky and manipulative i guess. i feel like this is break up worthy. what do y’all think?

So me and my boyfriend have been doing very good , in the beginning of us getting to know each other he was getting to know 3 other girls which is fine we weren’t dating. When he confessed to one of the girls he wanted to take me more seriously therefore not talking to her anymore she freaked out and said “I can’t believe ur leaving me for her out of anyone she’s a hoe …” you get the gist . So when I found out this information I blocked her on my instagram since I didn’t want to deal with the negativity from her and he said he didn’t want to block her so he could flex on her (idk) . Last week we were cuddling and he goes on the App airbuds and she’s on there still (probably from when they were talking) I get upset because why is she on there (he only has 2 other people) and as never invited me to join the app so I got jealous but he unadds her and I get over it. However today I was scrolling on TikTok and I saw her pop up on my phone and I can see he still follows her and I don’t get upset but just curious . I unblock her on instagram and I see that he still follows her on that and whatever right , I click on her most recent post and he liked it? I just feel embarrassed and a bit humiliated in the sense that he doesn’t want her and she said all these rude things about me but he’s still liking all her posts (I’m guessing TikTok too at this point) I do have bpd but very well managed and I don’t have angry outbursts but given my dating history this was a huge trigger for me and I just don’t know if I have a right to be upset. Please help :(

My boyfriend(21M) and I(20F) have been together for 2.5 years and the last two years he got me a few nice, thoughtful gifts and handwritten cards. This year he asked me what I wanted for christmas and I sent him a few things I wanted as options(around $20 each) and I asked him what he wanted. I bought him a couple things he told me he wanted and made him something handmade. I spent around $90 on his presents and put effort into making him something. Lately, I feel that he has been smoking and drinking too much and I have tried to talk to him about it multiple times, with him never changing or seeming to listen to what I say. He came over to my house on christmas eve and I was excited to give him his gifts and I asked him where mine was jokingly. He told me it was coming in the mail which I believed. I gave him mine anyways because I was excited to show him and a couple of my family members also gave him gifts. Last night, I felt like something was off so I asked him if something is really coming in the mail and he said “No I’m sorry I didn’t get you anything”. I asked him why and he said he didn’t know what to get me, which makes no sense since I literally sent him exact photos of things I wanted and he knows me well enough to pick something out anyways. I don’t care about getting anything expensive or nice but I would have loved and appreciated even just a card. And I feel like we mutually agreed to get each other gifts. This made me feel like he put no effort or care towards me when I put in a lot of effort to pick out things he’d like and make him something. Today I broke up with him because it made me feel that he doesn’t care about me as much as he used to. I feel like him not getting me anything has to do with him smoking and drinking so much because how can he have all the time to smoke and drink every day and not 5 minutes to even write me a card? I feel bad that he is having these problems, but I am tired of doing everything I can to help him when he doesn’t listen at all and denies he has any problem. AITA for breaking up with someone I’ve been with for 2 years now that he in my opinion is having substance issues and AIO for ending the relationship over him not getting me a gift?

hi all. i posted earlier about a complicated situationship where i felt all that was wanted from me was sex.

I wasn’t expecting my post to blow up like it did, and i definitely wasn’t expecting so many people rushing to the comments to support me.

I’m so, so thankful for the poeple that reached out to offer a hand. I was in a really dark place and knowing that poeple had my back really helped pull me out of it all.

I was being groomed. and i can see that now, even if it’s a little hard to admit. being autistic means that picking up on clues can be impossible, so your words meant everything.

thank you so much💗💗💗

My boyfriend asked me months ago what I wanted for Christmas and I told him I just wanted money to go towards buying an electric piano. Specifically with 88 weighted keys. I explained they're expensive (around $1200) and I didn't expect him to get me something that big.

He insisted that he was going to get it for me since it was all I wanted, and I admit I was super excited about it. I also figured it would be fair if I also bought him an expensive gift. I settled on a very nice guitar, an amp and a couple other things that totalled close to $1000. The guitar was actually that much alone but I got an amazing deal on it. I drove 8 hours to get this for him.

For context he makes about double my income, and isn't good with money in the sense he spends it recklessly without worrying about the future. I'm not great with it but not as bad as him. As we got closer to Christmas I just had a feeling I wouldn't not be getting the piano as it seemed like he was pretty broke. I even commented on this and said it's OK.

Christmas morning I saw a couple big presents under the tree but there was no way they could have been the piano since they're quite long. I honestly almost thought it was a joke when I opened up a small keyboard. I tried to look happy but I was so upset.

Over the months I had explained why I wanted a full size piano and why the weighted keys were so important to me. I already own a keyboard like the one he got me when I was 8 years old. It's still at my parents house. I had told him in the past that while it was great as a kid I really don't like playing them and I would never buy one like that and didn't really care to bring it to our apartment.

He was setting it up and asking me about buttons and I said something along the lines of "yes, I know because it's the exact same thing I have at my parents" he asked if that was bad and I said we'll I'm just really confused you would buy something I told you I didn't want, and already own.

He explained he didn't have enough money and thought that this would be a great compromise since that's the only thing I wanted. He said that I wouldn't need to use the extra keys anyways (that part really pissed me off).

We both kept apologizing at the time and we agreed not to talk about it more on Christmas since it was ruining the mood.

I didn't want to be ungrateful but honestly my feelings are really hurt because it felt like he didn't listen to me at all, didn't care enough to set money aside for me despite telling me he was buying it, and then just expected me to be thrilled over something I didn't want.

Aio about my boyfriend buying me a gift I didn't want or was it close enough that I shouldn't be upset about it ?

I just can’t with people and their petty demands or am I being petty for wanting to ghost this person?