r/asktransgender • u/SubparSaiyan • 2d ago
Did your hobbies/ interests change while transitioning?
We talk a lot about sexualities "changing" (or realizing it's not what they originally thought) awhile after starting hormones. I'm curious if you've noticed yourself lose interest in certain hobbies and activities while gaining that interest in others, and how long into your specified transition you started to noticed this shift.
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u/Spanishbrad 2d ago
I am 20 years on HRT, post-op , re married and I am the same person as before hrt but the female version. Oh yes much more emotional and not fearless as before
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u/transonlyacct 2d ago
On HRT for 16 years.
Mine didn't. Of course, I haven't been static -- it's been 16 years! -- but I've experienced more shifts than actual changes, and the shifts I've experienced I'd more ascribe to getting older and the perspective changes that come with that, rather than due to transitioning.
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u/Confirm_restart GirlOS running on bootleg, modified hardware 1d ago
Yep, and pretty early on.
It's been a couple of years now and I'm still figuring out what continues to hold my interest and what has fallen by the wayside.
Though to be fair I've had a million different hobbies (and jobs) throughout my life. I suspect because I was trying to fill that void that was the sense of something missing, and I was seeking it externally when it was really in me all along.
Now that I've figured out what that missing piece is, my outside diversions seem less necessary, interesting, or important than they used to.
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u/chillfem 1d ago edited 1d ago
(MtF, trans girl) Yes, I became considerably less compulsive and competitive in general. Lost interest in certain physical activities like aggressive hiking, climbing trees for fun.. Certain adrenaline inducing behaviors like unnecessarily blitzing triple digit speeds on my motorcycle. I just become less aggressive in general. Lost interest in certain things entirely.
I used to love snow boarding but now I just hate being out in the cold. I just feel so much calmer and sane in general running on estrogen and progesterone, vs when I was functioning on T. My entire mental and emotional state has become rewired. For the first time in my life I just feel normal. Much less of an asshole now, and I play guitar more. For me there's a tremendous difference between T brain and E brain. Completely different person inside and out from the first two years of "moderate to aggressive" hormone use.
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u/Flashy_Cranberry_957 1d ago
I'm still figuring stuff out, but I started liking beer after taking T. I'm also more into social interaction now.
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u/rallysato 1d ago
My hobbies all stayed the same. I'm still heavily into firearms, cars, and RC cars. However I do tend to paint my RC cars more feminine these days
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u/Gadgetmouse12 1d ago
My motivation changed but the hobbies are the same. I used to bike to get away from society and just be myself en femme. As a mountain biker I could dress out in kit that made me very passable and enjoy my time in a vast park where nobody knew me. Sure I was lonely but solitude is different. I found escapism socially inside second life as my girl self. My marriage was transphobic.
When she left and I was faced with the option to restart, I did. Day 1 I came out. My only close friend said “duh, about time”.
Then I decided to skip the costume bits and be fully non passing out. If people were going to accept me at ground zero then they would be good. Then I was blown away at all the acceptance that I received. Even my transphobic ex wife came around to accepting. Now I finally got to experience the joy of female friendships en masse. En reality. Barely any time for online games. Instead I now know what truly engaging friends are and I would never go back.
Now I don’t have the same drive to go for long solitary rides of escape. I have drive to join friends in rides.
I still love building things and painting things, but they fill the time between friends time.
Now I look back on my time as a man in society and as a husband and realize how much of a lonely prison I was in. How many cis men are inside that and don’t know it or what to do about it.
When I was seen as a straight man it was hard to get women to open up on a deeper level. As an asexual I need to clarify that I never approached a relationship sexually, though men too often do and that expectation is superimposed upon us out of experience. Now I don’t get that wall when I am socializing with women. Men seem more likely to wall me now, but I never clicked with them anyway.
Ironically, now I get eyerolls when I go to men’s bike rides. Even overhead one remark of “she’s holding us back” (I was still mid pack even on a slow day). Rite of passage for the women of that group though.
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u/stonebolt 1d ago
I (mtf) got more curious about other people's feelings and got more interested in violent movies/tv/ movies
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u/AmyNotAmiable 1d ago
I started exercising a lot more, because I heard it gets harder to lose weight after awhile on HRT and especially with progesterone. Endorphins are addictive, so that's become a new hobby even though I don't feel too overweight anymore.
Other than that, it's been more of a shift in things I already liked. Like, I do more cooking and less video games, but I enjoyed both of those things before and I still do. My interests haven't changed much so far, but my priorities for my future have.
It's only been 3-4 months though, so it's too soon for me to say for sure.
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u/Lenalov3ly 1d ago
The only hobby that really changed was an interest in clothing and fashion and make up. Aside from that I’m still a tech geek lol
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u/Countess_Schlick Trans lady - I find pants oppressive. 1d ago
Yeah, quite a lot. The interest shift came in stages that loosely correlated to when I stopped seeing myself as a man and when others stopped seeing myself as a man.
My interest in video games largely disappeared for a couple of years. I no longer play FPSs or open-world games, which is what I primarily played for a long time. I remember excitedly buying Red Dead Redemption 2, remembering how much I enjoyed the first game. However, as soon as I booted up the game and played about 15 minutes of it, I realized I didn't want to pretend to be a cowboy anymore. I've gotten a little more into gaming recently after my ex broke up with me, making me sad and with less to do on the weekend. I've mostly been playing cozy games since then. In the past week or so, I've been playing Metaphor: Re Fantazio. (Most of the characters are adorable, which is now a requirement for me to enjoy a game these days.)
Also, it turns out that if you start feeling like the gender you are, you get a lot less depressed and want to go outside more? After starting to transition, I started doing nature photography, kayaking, backpacking, and travelling a lot more. I also like making stuff? I own almost as many power tools as my sister does. (My sister is a huge tool nerd.)
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u/PizzaBoob777 1d ago
I went from being a rock n roll superstar to being the next biggest thing in electronic music since aphex twin
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u/_TheAccount_ 1d ago
Yeah I lift and am way more into exercise now - I believe it is because I am at a point where I love myself and want to stay healthy. Plus putting on muscle feels quite affirming.
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u/laughing_crowXIII 1d ago
I have changed a little bit.
I still play video games. But I don’t need as much escapism as I used to. I like to go to clubs now! That’s a new thing for me for sure. Makeup has become a big thing.
I still like to write creatively.
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u/TwoSpiritOneMe 1d ago
One thing very early on for me is I WANNA DANCE now lol I guess I held that in. But now I’m like why didn’t I ever learn to dance?!
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u/SubparSaiyan 1d ago
I can relate to this! I always loved dancing but now it feels like an uncontrollable need when a good beat comes on or sometimes just out of the blue x)
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u/fixittrisha 1d ago
My intrests have stayed the same. 11 months HRT MTF. Still like cars, dirt bikes, skiing, baking, ect.
Side note my sexuality didnt change either 😅😂
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u/Destrina Queer-Transfemme 40 HRT: 2024-04-02 1d ago
I gained some hobbies, like clothes, skin care, makeup, etc. But I didn't lose any. I still do warhammer, Magic, video games, ttrpgs, etc.
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u/ericfischer Erica, trans woman, HRT 9/2020 2d ago
I lost my motivation for everything two years before I transitioned. I hoped transition would either bring back my old interests or give me some new ones, but it didn't.
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u/kimchipowerup 2d ago
I used to be really into motorcycles and now, over 10 yrs later, I’m like “eh, whatever” and haven’t ridden in all of that time.
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u/Blahaj500 1d ago
I got a 600 a couple weeks after starting HRT, and if anything, I think I’ve gotten a little more daring on rides.
I do always wear gear now though.
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u/dismallyOriented Trans man | Married 9/21/24 1d ago
Haven't really changed my hobbies all that much, and I've been dudening for just over 5 years now - the one more "masculine" hobby I took up (martial arts) was something that predated my realization by 2 years. Some folks might give themselves permission to start a hobby they were socialized away from, or felt was gender-locked from them, but to a degree these things are more based on what interests you as a person than anything gender related. The only gender-related thing I can think of is getting introduced to one hobby over another based on how you were raised or what sorts of things your childhood friends were into.
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u/enbykraken 1d ago
Mostly the same, with a few minor shifts, though I found some interest in former activities and I really leaned into cooking and took over most of the cooking responsibilities at home - my wife hates cooking and was very happy about that change.
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u/Altaccount_T Trans man, 27, UK 1d ago edited 1d ago
I've always had a mix of hobbies (plus a habit of constantly picking up new ones) and never really cared that much about the stereotypes around them - but I felt more confident doing those once I was clearly gendered correctly. From a gender related perspective, I don't think it changed much for me.
I think having top surgery made a difference though - once dysphoria, fear of being outed, and practical considerations with my chest were less of an issue (eg, before having top surgery, I was put off of any activities that'd involve wetsuits, being shirtless, or otherwise in tight-fitting/revealing equipment, running in a binder was physically uncomfortable due to lack of support, etc) - I enjoy active hobbies like paddleboarding and swimming a lot more now.
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u/KawaiiCryptids 1d ago
No, I'm still into a lot of feminine things and some neutral stuff like video games and ttrpgs. It's kinda annoying that people assume I'm de-transitioning or something just cause I like looking cute and wearing makeup and collecting pastel pink things.
I consider myself nonbinary though. Been on T and have shorter hair than pre transition me did. It's still long-ish by most guy standards but idc.
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u/ComplaintOwn9855 1d ago
Personally, it is my outlook on life that made me transition, not the other way around.
I only cracked the egg 3 months ago, but in the last ten years, I started abhorring any kind of competition or XvX games. Zero sum games are the worst, and I would feel bad whether I won or lost. Winning means making someone else sad, losing means *I'm* sad and I can't even express it or I'd be a sore loser.
I'm a fucking ball of hyper-empathy, and I learned to embrace it. I hug my friends all the times. There is a running gag in my group of friends: if at any point in a party I start telling people I love them, it means I'm starting to get tipsy. Then I'll defend myself by saying "I love you all the time guys, I just..." "feel brave enough to say it out loud thanks to the alcohol", they will finish, laughing.
At this point, my theory is that my being so tactile and warm was a way for me to deal with my unconscious gender dysphoria, by behaving more along feminine codes. I also completely dropped the masculinity race and accepted myself as a somewhat-feminine guy. And so all of this lead to me coming out to myself.
Other than that, my interests didn't change so much as solidify. I've always been a political person, and transitioning changed my outlook on queer stuff especially. I tend to delve very deep into my hobbies and interests because I hate superficial knowledge (aka I'm hyperfixating, let's say it frankly), and lately I've been going deep into the trans media rabbit hole. Basically, I went from being an ally to being directly concerned, so my interests changed accordingly.
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u/ValerieeeAngel 1d ago
for me i would say my hobbies changed, or are changing, but tbh my egg fully cracked only like a week ago sooo i'm still early in it.
but a lot of my hobbies were to fit the fake persona i made up to fit in with the cishet boys. i dropped hobbies and am making new ones because i dont have to pretend to like the same things other men did so i fit in at work, at the bar, etc.
hobbies i had that felt more, me, i have kept. but they were usually done in private and are more open now
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u/Darkeldar1959 2d ago
I didn't change my hobbies, just the subject matter. Prior to transition I was mostly building Gunpla model kits. Currently, I'm building more Mecha Musume (Armored Girls), Slice of Life girls and strangely getting back into Maschinen Krieger.
Computer gaming, definitely doesn't have the appeal it used to.