I have had people telling me I should not have expected dems to risk a shutdown and it is unreasonable to hate them (too) for enabling the oppression of trans minors and their healthcare.

But I feel like we should not have let it happen so easily and I can't think of any other immutable groups who had their legal rights pushedback as a compromise (by 'our side') recently but that could also be my ignorance.

What is your take?

I jokingly said "I wish I could be cis man" to a long term friend recently and she laughter and said well you of all people could!

Uhh wait what? Why me of all the people, ah its because she does not see me as a woman... it just hurts...

For reference we were talking about dating. Before my transition women wanted more dates with me but I always broke it off because I felt like faking all the time.

I've been avoiding updating my birth certificate and identification for about 10 years because I had very mixed feelings about essentially marching up to the Texas state capitol and saying "hi please put me on a watchlist".

I spoke about these feelings to my counselor at the time and other trans people and basically everyone told me I was being paranoid, which I think was incredibly naive of them and sort of made me feel right (of course I have ODD).

Now Dan Patrick our Lt Governor has asked DPS for a list of everyone who's ever changed their gender, which they didn't provide.

Texas has also stopped changing all birth certificates.

I was detained by police last night and checked into a psych ward and I am almost positive it is because they were looking at a man but I had a female ID. I am worried that I made my life infinitly harder by not doing the paperwork when I didn't want to.

Can anyone relate or be informed enough on legal shit to reassure me this is a temporary time in Texas or let me use their time machine to tell my mom to STAY IN CALIFORNIA where she got pregnant with me?

EDIT: I am poor, my family is poor. I am saving and will hopefully be out of the state by the end of this year. Dear God I get told to move every day online I KNOW

Recently made another post about a family member possible being trans though their parents aren't LGBTQ friendly. Deciding to not confront or directly address it but instead just continue to do what I can to show that I'm a safe person for them.

We often watch movies together and sometimes shows. More often than not though their father joins us. Someone whom almost certainly voted for the cheeto. So I'm wondering if there are any movies that are subtle enough that the father would be willing to watch it but that the teen might be able to see the positive messaging.

I recently started HRT on christmas eve and was 100% accepting my new identity but.. texas doesn’t like us. I had to even drop out of college because I dormed at the University of Houston with boys and felt too uncomfortable. I tried to get my gender marker changed but apparently texas DPS made it illegal for documents to be updated. I also can’t change my name legally unless I go through the whole court petition process. Trump just won and i’m sure there’s hundreds of anti-trans bills on the way.

To add on, my dad and mom just split up and my transphobic dad wants me to live with him. He literally cheated on my mom and hits her. My supportive mom doesn’t have the capacity or income to keep me (the oldest) because she has to take care of my 3 younger siblings. I’m going to have to end up finding my own apartment to live in, stay with my non accepting dad, or move back to Louisiana.

I don’t even have a car yet and my job is in Texas. I’m trying to save for now but i’m not sure if staying in Texas is even worth it anymore since it’s a red state. I really want a solution because I already feel that people like us don’t fit into this world and I feel so hopeless. Why is it so hard to change my gender all because of the genitalia I was assigned at birth. I really need help with a plan to live my trans experience because I don’t want to de-transition anytime soon i just started hormones and i’m turning 19 this month.

For you all what was the moment ( if you can remember) that really solidified the fact that you are trans and wanted to transition (if that’s something you do want)? I am very very very newly identifying as trans and am looking to go on hormones (MtF) and for me it was always feeling badly about myself and how I looked and felt in my own body and how others saw me, I just never had the words to describe it as dysphoria until recently.

Sorry if this is a common post, like I said I’m newly trans identifying so I didn’t really use these subreddits before

So I'm 21f I've recently moved and I've started going on walks and two separate times within the few times I've gone walking the first time this guy honks at me as I'm going on the opposite side then turns around asks if I want a ride I tell him no and he asks again and I say no and walk away and then he leaves and comes back to ask for my number the second time the guy in a pickup truck drives past me honks and I keep walking and he kept going past but I noticed he stopped a little bit away and honked more and I keep walking having a creeping suspicion he's going to come back and sure enough he drives past me pulls into a driveway in reverse and stares at me for a second and I'm kinda just like walking and I feel like REALLY uncomfortable at this point but luckily he just drove past me again so is this how the average female experience?

Hey all! I wanted to open up about my experiences getting top surgery as someone who’s fat and disabled. I don’t see too many bigger people talking about their experiences with gender affirming care so here I am!

I had double incision top surgery with free nipple grafts on 12/5/24 with Dr Brodie Parent in Pittsburgh, PA.

I want to know if it's just me, every time I have doubts about my gender identity I come here to look for some post I can relate to calm myself down.
My psychologist tells me I should stop doing it.

There's this boy I really really like and I'm currently in a rental house till I can get to Canada. I'm currently in New York and I really like him. No one at the school knows I'm trans. I'm asking this question because A boy didn't wanna date me because I'm trans. (He was very respectful about it. Not rude at all.) which is okay if he doesn't feel comfortable. That's fine. But I feel like I have a bigger chance if I tell a boy. After we start dating. I bring up the fact that I was in a rental house because I don't know how long I'll be at the school so I might have to date him online from Canada later on.

I find it hard to keep my legs closed, and it sometimes makes me dysphoric. I don't know if it's something about my hips, my thick thighs, or the fact that I don't tuck, but it's genuinely uncomfortable to not sit with my legs in their natural, splayed position, and I know it doesn't look feminine at all. Plus, it's actually inconvenient in certain situations.

Hey all. Long post warning. I tried asking this question in the my child is trans group and it looks like no one has been active for quite some time in that subreddit.

Ok, here we go. Quick background-We have a household of people who dance in the rain under the trans umbrella. I am gender queer/non binary/trying to figure my shit out. My wife is transgender (MTF) and our daughter who is 8 years old is AMAB. My wife came out to me as trans August 2023, our daughter said she was a "boy girl" January 2024 and told us she is a girl July 2024.

We support our daughter 100%. We love that she is living her best life. We moved to Massachusetts from North Carolina to give her a safer place to be (and for my wife as well) and almost no one in the school except the teachers know she's AMAB and her dead name. She is a beautiful kind, crazy little girl.

There is no good way to ask this, but I need to help her with this. My wife hasn't had to use a gaff, or any kind of taping contraption because she is a "grower". Unfortunately, our daughter is the opposite. We had gotten her first girls bathing suit last year. It was a tankini with shorts. She wore them recently and she was distressed when she saw that pushing it back wasn't working anymore with that suit. It is too tight on the bottom. I wanted to allow her to pick out her own suit, it's her body and I want her to feel as comfortable and gorgeous as she possibly can. She picked out a super cute one piece suit, however I'm worried that something will pop out of the bottom or people will be able to see that she is AMAB. It's a typical bathing suit without a skirt or shorts. And yes, while I'd like to assume that no one will be looking at my child that intently -I know how distressed she gets if someone misgenders her or uses her dead name.

Do they make gaffs for kids? She is in a girl's size 12. The smallest option I found online was an adult small. Or are there any tips or tricks? She has a hard time tucking and having it stay tucked in a bathing suit.

Side note-Yes, we are going to get her on puberty blockers as soon as possible. My wife and I both don't want her to go through the same struggles my wife had with going through male puberty. The plan is to get her on puberty blockers, and by the time Darth Cheeto is out of office if she still feels like she was born in the wrong body we should be able to start her on HRT.

TL;DR Do they make gaffs for transgender girls or had anyone found a tucking tool or trick to help whilst wearing a bathing suit?

I just told my partner of 4 years what I have been thinking about for a Chosen name. The response... not negative, but not what I wanted...

I just wanted an "Awww that's pretty" or "I like it honey" or "Let's try it out"

What I got what, "Idk whatever, it's not my choice." Which I get it isn't, but... I love her... I want her to love ME. She's been with a man for 2 years, and I've been Non-binary for another almost 2 years and now I'm almost 27 this summer, she is 26 on the 7th. And I want to be a girl.

I just want a little positivity and to feel like my voice is heard.

I just don't want to ask for more positivity if she is just not ready for this all yet. It has been spurred on almost. I always said no to these feelings even when 2 years ago she caught me trying on her underwear. She has asked ms point blank and I would say No. No I don't want to be a girl. That's silly. I WOULD NEVER.

Yet now...

I realize the voice telling me these things has always been there and it won't stop unless I head HER call. I want to be a woman. I wish I could have hacked into my genome as a child and made myself into what I wanted to be. But back then. I didn't even know I was allowed to think like that let alone that Trans women exist or have existed for all of time.

I just want to be called Elara I love that name.

I thought it meant one thing, but it means "Hazzlenut" which I'm allergic to nuts and I found the irony funny. So I like it.

Am I just crazy?

We talk a lot about sexualities "changing" (or realizing it's not what they originally thought) awhile after starting hormones. I'm curious if you've noticed yourself lose interest in certain hobbies and activities while gaining that interest in others, and how long into your specified transition you started to noticed this shift.

I work a mandatory-overtime factory job which puts me at 50-60 hours a week. I have no time nor reason to physically transition outside of taking my hormones, and it is taking a toll on my mental health. How do I get the time and motivation to pretty myself up for anything? I never have time to go anywhere but work, then back home to sleep :c

Even when I am invited to go somewhere, it’s always last minute with like 10 minutes to get ready or I’m being left behind

title. i know. same as everyone else, right? i don’t think i’ll leave this up for more than a few days as i have a rule about posting things online that don’t contribute positivity.

31 cis-pan male questioning. my state is super progressive, thankfully and i’ve been with my therapist for over a year now. she knows where i’m at with all this and we’re working on it (she is also around my age and extremely progressive).

soooo. ASD, antidepressants, stimulants, gender dysphoria, “wrong” body, and a random post to a subreddit i searched later, i’m here. hi. can i ask y’all some stuff, pls?

i already have a pretty substantial agoraphobia that ramped up over the last few months (we’re working on that too) after losing my last job, and i’ve been twisting myself into knots trying to find a decent WFH job, especially if i start E. tl;dr how the heck do you transition and not draw attention to yourself? more so, during your transition period what was your work situation like?

also…i’ve got family that swear up and down they’d never see me as anything other than their kid, but i feel like this would disparate real quick if i dropped a “hey i think i’m a goth girlie and not a spooky boi.” my brother knows i’m pansexual (younger, 23 cis-het). if you had/have family or close folks who have said similar things to you, how do you even start to have that conversation?

also also….i have to ask. my psychiatrist and therapist both say i’m not too old to be considering a transition process. anyone do or did what i wanna do? i know you folks aren’t all doctors but just purely from an experience standpoint.

lastly…how the heck did yall come up with your names? i’m already not a fan of my birth name and want to change it but i don’t even know where to start thinking of names.

anyways clearly i’m a nervous wreck rambling to strangers but if you’ve made it this far just know i love you to pieces and any wisdom you can impart on this lil goblin would be greatly appreciated. i’m writing this before i try and sleep so if i get a message you may not get one back til the mañana.

oki. thank you. signed, a potential transfem lesbian or themperor 🥚

My egg cracked the other day and I realized I'm definitely not cis. I've avoided discussing anything gender related about myself with my mom for a while. She's absolutely an ally but she doesn't understand a lot of deeper LGBTQ+ things. With my living situation, I know I'd have to go through her if I wanted to try hormones or anything else major.

All of this has me anxious about how I should bring it up, and my anxiety disorders don't help things. Does anybody have any tips or experiences of their own they could share?

I'm FTM; 1.5 years into social transition, and 10 months on testosterone. I am currently unable to stealth tho bc of life circumstances, so everyone in my life knows I'm trans.

I think I've made pretty good progress on this so far, considering that I used to have terrible social anxiety. But occasionally there's a situation that still really hurts. For example, I had a new coworker start a few months ago who was into a lot of the same interests I am (gaming, the horror genre, etc).

Well, we started off awkward bc she started constantly flirting with me. I do pass as cis at this point but I am definitely clockably gay, so I was a little confused why she was acting like this. I at first assumed she was joking, then realized she wasn't as the flirting got more intense, even once she knew I had a boyfriend. I realized that she was probably assuming I was bi, or thought she could "turn" me (bc she is objectively a beautiful woman - unfortunately some straight women see gay men as challenges to seduce, like a lot of straight guys see lesbians).

Before I had the chance to straight up reject her, she learned that I was trans bc I mentioned it in a conversation with others, about an old transphobic coworker who used to work there. She literally physically recoiled and looked shocked. She then asked if she should call me she/her, "since I'm trans". I corrected and said I'm female-to-male, and she should call me he. She looked even more shocked.

She was very cold towards me for a couple of months afterwards, deflecting my attempts to be friendly. She's since warmed up and talks to me at work, but sometimes I still catch her looking at me funny (honestly looks a bit angry). I wouldn't call us friends by any definition of the word. It's obvious that she was upset that she couldn't clock me as trans, and now knows that she could be attracted to a trans man without knowing he's trans. And I suspect she was also miffed that I never reciprocated interest.

I can't exactly pinpoint what's making this hurt so much. I think it's multiple things. Like the fact that we could have been good friends, if she wasn't transphobic. And the fact that people like her definitely don't see me as an actual gay man. I take a lot of pride in the fact that I'm gay, bc of how much extra bullshit gay trans people have had to go through (like historically being denied HRT bc "gay trans people can't exist" - and this still happens too). So I still get very angry when people invalidate us.

I know people's reactions to me aren't my problem. I know it has nothing to do with me how people react to me. And people's invalidation doesn't change the fact that I am a gay man. But it still bothers me that I get this upset sometimes. I want to get to a place where I just don't care about people's reactions to me. But is that even possible?