r/Aquariums • u/Main_Initial_7118 • Jan 25 '24

Parents cleaned my tanks without asking :/ Betta

Came home today to this. First pic is what they put the fish in for god knows how long, last pic is my tank before they cleaned it. They told me it was bc my room looked “messy”. They are old so I don’t blame them…. But damn…

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u/jk01 Jan 25 '24

The problem with this is it can come off as an attack and just anger the person instead of teaching them. The way they worded it attacks the problem, not the person. I wouldn't be surprised if they just didn't know any better.

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u/[deleted] Jan 25 '24

It's almost like taking other people's stuff apart and ruining their work is an attack and being told you fucked up is a normal consequence of that...

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u/jk01 Jan 25 '24

I hear you, but if you want it to actually make a difference explaining why it's a problem is necessary in most cases.

They probably thought they were helping. Random people that don't keep fish don't know that this fucks things up. So controlling your emotions and speaking to them like a person is more productive.

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u/[deleted] Jan 25 '24

The tanks don’t need to be cleaned; the water is supposed to stay in there because it has cycled and that is what’s best for the fish. Now, I have to start over and it’s going to stress them out and it might kill them! The tank was perfectly fine and running as is

Does that not explain why?

Also I take issue with the subtext of "speaking to them like a person". Are you saying the redditor you were replying to was speaking to them not like a person?

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u/jk01 Jan 25 '24

Listen dude, I'm not gonna sit here and argue with you. If you're too socially inept to realize tone matters then that's on you.

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u/[deleted] Jan 25 '24

I'm engaging with your points. You're calling me names. Who's socially inept, exactly?