Yea, but you also can't expect every person you meet to behave respectfully. They might not even realize they are being offensive or how dumb their questions are. Its definitely better to just have fun and start giving th bogus answers, see just how crazy answers you can get away with
This can be a weekly, extremely invasive event, I sure hell have enough respect for myself to know that this shit is unacceptable, and I'm gonna be mad. It's dumb and rude to ask about a stranger genitals or sex life and anyone who doesn't realize that is socially inept in the worst way
Once again, I realize this. Which is why I'm not asking these questions myself. But is it really worth it to sit there and let some random person upset you on a weekly basis cus they don't understand their questions make you uncomfortable? I mean, that seems like a lot of wasted energy to me, especially since you can turn their dumb questions back on them and have a good time with it instead. I guess I just don't understand the point of getting offended.
You don't see the point in getting offended? There's no point! It's a human reaction and completely justified. Although one could argue that another 'point' in getting offended is that it leads to many social justice movements, because people don't take that shit lying down. I realise there's great risk in even using those words on reddit.
the only people who say shit like "dont yourself get upset" are those trying to remove fault from the guilty party and place it. "Just deal with it" is not a solution, it's letting people.
I really truly don't think you understand what dysphoria costs my mental energy and wellbeing. If it was as simple as "don't think about it" then, don't you think i would have fucking done that already. People casually bring up some of the most painful shit i have to deal with day in and day out just so they can get their kicks learning about "the freak" and I'm just supposed to be cool with it? No chance.
Heh. The way I see it, you are almost turning yourself into a voluntary victim instead of controlling the situation and coming out on top. You can't control what others do or say, only how you react. Reacting by being offended means the only person coming out of the convo upset or in a bad mood is you. I would never let some asshole have that effect on me. Turn their stupidity back on them and walk away smirking. My situation isn't as enotional as yours, simply being from a different country, but I think my view can be applied to both situations and doing so ends up better for you.
some fucking asshole: "learn to love it or you're making yourself the victim"
Alternatively, we could hold grown adults accountable and not try an turn it on me, because it makes me feel like shit to have invasive questions asked of me. If yo're not trans you have no place telling how to deal with shit you have no frame of reference for.
Ok fine, go come up with a plan to change every single person on this planet's behavior to make sure no one accidentally offends you. Im sure there is a realistic solution out there somewhere. But until you do, why not try what I said and try not getting offended so you don't end up upset anytime someone asks you a question.
You don't seem to get it. Dysphoria can give me a panic attack, fuck up my whole day, make me want to die. These invasive discussions bring up dysphoric feelings. I know i can't change every-bodies behavior, but i sure as hell have the right to be fucking mad about it.
What's your goal here?
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u/TheRaesoftheSun Jul 13 '15
Curiosity is fine, I'm often curious about things that aren't my business, but I'm an adult so i keep that shit in my head