r/AskReddit Jul 13 '15

What socially unacceptable things are you OK with?

8.4k Upvotes

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965

u/ChrisPrattsLoveChild Jul 13 '15

Other people not drinking. I have a few friends who for their own reasons dont drink and every time we are out they have so many people astounded that they dont drink and trying to get them to drink.

24

u/gmessad Jul 14 '15

I appreciate this. If someone does not drink, I find it weird when people don't just let it go. They can't just trust that I have my reasons. Write out a list of the pros and cons of consuming alcohol. Why do I need an "excuse?"

90

u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15

Me and my girlfriend both don't drink by choice. She likes that I don't because she doesn't like being around drunk people, which is why she won't drink. I just don't enjoy being drunk so I don't do it, but I'm around my drink friends at parties and I don't care. But people bother us about it all the time. I almost punched a kid in the face before he stopped offering. It's not that I'm against it he was just so annoying.

14

u/DukeOfDownvotes Jul 14 '15

My wife and I also don't drink, and never have. It's good to be able to relate to people who deal with annoying buttholes like we do. Good on ya.

9

u/venomae Jul 14 '15

Yea, we have the same thing. I cant even count the amount of times I have been offered that someone will "teach me how to drink" cause obviously I dont know that if I'm not a borderline alcoholic.

3

u/momsasylum Jul 14 '15

I know exactly how you both feel and its annoying as fuck. Next time you're out one of you tells the person you're allergic, and the other has Alcohol Flush Syndrome. And that's what drew you to each other, that should get them off your back.

3

u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15

I like being honest. Sometimes I think people attach a stigma to alcohol and they feel that if I'm not drinking then that must mean that everyone else who is drunk is doing something wrong. People don't like being wrong but I wish they understood it's okay to drink and it's also okay not to.

3

u/giraffe_princess Jul 14 '15

My boyfriend and I are the same! People who try to get you to drink only make me happier about my choice

4

u/BeatSkeetAndRetreat Jul 14 '15

Obviously it's by choice

2

u/Iouis Jul 14 '15

It's not my choice I'm allergic :(

2

u/kia_the_dead Jul 14 '15

I guess the only people who would offer are, themselves, drunk, which would only worsen the situation.

1

u/truthdoctor Jul 14 '15

I just don't enjoy being drunk

I just enjoy being buzzed. There is middle ground between being sober and drunk.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15

I don't like the buzzed feeling. I've never been truly drunk but I've never had great fun with alcohol.

2

u/TVCasualtydotorg Jul 14 '15

I wish there was for me. I go from sober to fucked up.

-24

u/Go_Sabres Jul 14 '15

Having a drink or two doesn't mean you're drunk.

15

u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15

I understand that. She doesn't mind buzzed people but she has bad anxiety. I don't like being buzzed either. I've never been DRUNK but I've never had a positive experience with alcohol either. Nothing terrible I just don't enjoy myself.

14

u/Ga1apagO Jul 14 '15

Depends on the person

22

u/tomba444 Jul 14 '15

You sound like the kind of person he'd punch in the face.

0

u/Go_Sabres Jul 16 '15

And why is that?

3

u/tomba444 Jul 16 '15

Because that's exactly the kind of shit that people say when they try to pressure others into drinking, and it's annoying.

-7

u/Fearltself Jul 14 '15

Nope, you're either stone cold sober or black out wasted. There is no in between.

33

u/bbluech Jul 14 '15

This! Both my parents are alcoholics (both sober for 10+ years before I was born) but like no way am I gonna drink because I'm genetically predisposed to being an alcoholic. Still awkward as hell at parties though.

51

u/rebelaessedai Jul 14 '15

My roommate is like this. His parents were alcoholics and crack addicts. He won't touch weed or alcohol, or any potentially habit forming drugs.

What he does instead is drink four two liters of Mountain Dew every day and spend all of his free moments playing games on the computer.

He's still an addict.

32

u/Hayasaka-chan Jul 14 '15

He picked his poison.

5

u/BlaikeMethazine Jul 14 '15

He is still an addict, yes.

But he's better off with the Mountain Dew than with alcoholism.

1

u/rebelaessedai Jul 15 '15

I don't know, I mean between the two it means he's very sedentary, and he looks like an alcoholic with a beer gut and a meth addict with no teeth because they rotted out from his habit. He's 34. All that sugar might be a big problem down the road.

Still probably better than alcoholism, but definitely dangerous.

3

u/psycospaz Jul 14 '15

Sounds like I'd get along great with your roommate.

1

u/rebelaessedai Jul 15 '15

We should start up a roommate finding service called "Roommates Anonymous," where you find people based on what addictions you share.

17

u/Sveinson Jul 14 '15

I don't drink. Every time I am at a party my friends ask if I want some alcohol, and when I resfuse, they usually shout something like "more for us!" and keep on drinking them down.

I also happen to DD a lot.

3

u/cadraig Jul 14 '15

err.... Drink & Drive? Double-Down? Dungeons & Dragons?

5

u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15

Designated Driver

5

u/Log_in_Password Jul 14 '15

so many possibilities, i don't have a clue either.

2

u/Sveinson Jul 14 '15

Designated driver

7

u/deathglitter Jul 14 '15

I agree. This infuriates me. I like drinking, but some nights I just don't feel like it. Also, I have several friends who have struggled with alcoholism or who just don't like being drunk, and they have every right not to drink but to still come out and be sociable. It's a huge sign of immaturity and insensitivity when people can't respect that.

8

u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15

People who try to get people to drink who are not drinking for ANY reason, be it partied hard the night before or swore it off for the rest of my life so I don't drink myself to death, are horrible people straight up. It's a really heated topic, leave it the fuck alone.

7

u/idealgrind Jul 14 '15

Yes! Wish people would stop hounding me. I have AIH (autoimmune hepatitis) so I can't really drink. Still do on the odd celebration, though. But even AFTER I tell someone that and they're like "yeah naaaaah come on have a drink, I'll buy you one" I'm just like... seriously? You 'buying' makes no difference. You're seriously an idiot. End conversation here and don't make friends with this person.

On the other hand, I'm usually the designated driver which is awesome and my good friends really appreciate it.

3

u/Crunchyonion Jul 14 '15

I also have AIH, and I didn't drink before i knew I even had it. People would never stop telling me "com on have a drink". Or "Don't be a pussy and drink". Then I got AIH and it all stoped. Really I need to have a condition for you to stop? The why question should be taboo, It can be a really personal thing.

2

u/idealgrind Jul 14 '15

Yeah, I know what you mean! However, for me, even after I tell people I have AIH (not just that, but actually explain what it means) they're like "...soooooo you sure you don't want a drink?". Mate, what on earth do you think? With the exception of my closest friends who completely understand and then have my back when I'm dealing with said idiots haha.

Sometimes I wish there wasn't such a big drinking culture in Australia. It's seriously a massive problem but not many people 'get' that.

18

u/KittyHammer Jul 14 '15

I love not drinking in places where people are drinking. I love watching others drunk while I am sober. Quality entertainment.

16

u/LoneWolfe2 Jul 14 '15

That's exactly why so many drinkers have an issue with non-drinkers.

6

u/Scottz0rz Jul 14 '15

Drunk people are fucking hilarious as long as they're not in a place that I am responsible for cleaning.

Although if someone is drunk at my drive-thru window, I get mad. I've had several family members hit or killed by drunk drivers, and I'll tell my manager to call the damn cops if the driver isn't sober. Stupid fucking college brats.

3

u/KittyHammer Jul 14 '15

Can you explain why drinkers would have an issue because of that?

5

u/bbrpst Jul 14 '15

Not him but can give you my perspective. Sometimes you just wanna let loose and drink and have fun. Sometimes (maybe even often) you do some stupid stuff, and what you least want is someone who was sober and watched to rub it in your face the days after. I respect people who don't drink, whatever they want is fine to me, but i probably wouldn't invite them to a party if the intention was to drink.

2

u/KittyHammer Jul 14 '15

Fair yet what if their intention is to join along in the fun? Or is this just a concern of "what if" scenarios?

1

u/Usurethatsright_bot Jul 14 '15

Hey /u/bbrpst, shouldn't that be "want to"?

6

u/apriloneil Jul 14 '15

I work in a bar, and it's really frustrating how sometimes people just don't understand when a staff member doesn't drink. For whatever reasons - they're on medication, they're hungover, they quit drinking, they don't like drinking. It doesn't matter. While I love the people I work with, there is a real big culture of binge drinking and as someone who is trying to cut back on drinking for my mental and physical health, it makes it really hard to stay on track when people are shoving tequila shots in your face and giving you shit for turning down a drink.

2

u/DukeOfDownvotes Jul 14 '15

Good for you duder. Keep doing what you're doing, and let everyone who doesn't like it fuck right off.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15

[deleted]

1

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '15

call jon taffer!

12

u/Dragynwing Jul 14 '15

I'm a recovering alcoholic and I appreciate the normies like you who don't act aghast at my non-drinking habits. The thing is, I don't abstain from drinking because drinking was a ton of fun and I hate good times. I don't drink because drinking for me is terrible suffering. It's a bad experience for me and everyone around me. I don't get offended by people drinking around me. I think it's great that others can enjoy drinking. I can't and that's fine with me. I'm a happy sober person and a miserable drunk.

11

u/Cogeno Jul 14 '15

I have a friend like this. I usually drive because buses turn to shit past 11PM, Uber surge pricing occasionally gets out of hand, and riding in a normal taxi around here usually has me making deals with God just in case.

When I go out, I tend to keep the alcohol to a minimum for the above reason. Even after explaining that, he insists on buying me drinks (including hard liquor).

4

u/gazwel Jul 14 '15

Scotland is bad for this.

TAKE A DRINK! TAKE A DRINK!

1

u/emu90 Jul 14 '15

Australia is at least on par.

1

u/Usurethatsright_bot Jul 14 '15

Hey /u/emu90, shouldn't that be "Australia"?

1

u/emu90 Jul 14 '15

I think the bot's broken.

1

u/Usurethatsright_bot Jul 14 '15

I'm running on what is basically a potato, cut me some slack.

1

u/emu90 Jul 14 '15

Hey, wasn't me going about correcting your perfect spelling!
Just some helpful feedback haha

1

u/gazwel Jul 14 '15

A Scottish v Aussie drinking competition would be interesting to say the least...

Maybe we could get the Irish to judge?

1

u/emu90 Jul 14 '15

Those cunts would be too drunk to judge shit.

3

u/sherribobbins Jul 14 '15

Yup. Ex husband was an abusive belligerent drunk. I don't drink. I don't get invited to parties either. Sad.

2

u/electromage Jul 14 '15

Damn, this as annoying. I drink now and then, but I've never been drunk. I had friends who told me that they don't feel like they know me because they've never seen me drunk. Haven't talked to them in years.

I also feel bad when people I'm with decline to drink and everyone grills them about it, and offers to buy them drinks. People have their own reasons, and we should respect that.

It's probably a combination of trying to make sure they're having a good time, and jealousy.

1

u/DukeOfDownvotes Jul 14 '15

When I was 16, and my best friend started smoking and drinking, he said to me "man, DukeOfDownvotes, we're such good friends. Imagine how much closer we'd be if you weren't straight edge." What a prick. Imagine how close we'd be if you didn't put shit like weed and booze before friendship. We're still friends, but it's never been the same after he said that.

1

u/PianoMastR64 Jul 14 '15

Imagining life after nationwide pot legalization, I wonder if we'll develop the same attitude toward smoking.

1

u/SnapeWho Jul 14 '15

Obligatory piggyback to mention /r/teetotal for anyone who might be interested.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15

It's a fucking nightmare! As someone who gave up drinking a couple years ago, I can relate. I get all sorts of obnoxious questions, the latest being, "Why? Are you trying to lose weight?" Um, no. I'm clearly snacking on fries right now. Does that mean you're trying to gain weight by drinking?

The other annoying thing is when people apologize for drinking around me, and they do it in a weird way that sounds like they're trying to justify drinking, even though I never mention it. "Hey, do you mind if I have a drink?" "What? Of course not. Do whatever you want. " "I'm sorry. It's just...I just really like to have a drink with dinner." "Then have a drink with dinner. " "I hope it's okay...I don't want you to feel uncomfortable. " "FOR FUCK'S SAKE, I'LL POUR YOUR DRINK MYSELF."

1

u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15

Yea every time I'm with people who drink, they get plastered and say shit they probably shouldn't have said and wouldn't have said if they were sober. I'm sitting here like, awesome, I really didn't need to know that about you, but thanks for that....

1

u/JonasBrosSuck Jul 14 '15

as someone who doesn't like drinking(doesn't taste good) i'm trying to be more vocal about not drinking, but it's sometimes difficult cos i don't want to be the buzzkill

1

u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15

I love teetotallers, they sometimes drive me home if I buy them a few soft drinks.

I think people don't like what they can't understand and they don't know it, like I don't fully understand the aversion to drinking, but it's their choice I figure maybe they just saw alcoholics in their family or they do it for health reasons or maybe they just experience it differently to normal people. Either way it's fair enough.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15

My girlfriend doesn't drink and it's because of a medical issue. It winds me up that she has to tell people that to stop them practically pouring drinks down her throat. Why the fuck should she have to tell you anything about her medical history? A simple "no thank you" is fine in any other situation but people are so weird about alcohol.

I can only imagine how hard it must be if you are recovering alcoholic. The temptation would be hard enough to resist without people buying them for you even though you said no!

I understand wanting to be polite and generous but there is a point at which you've gone too far and it becomes quite rude imo.

1

u/RabbitSlayer212 Jul 14 '15

My biggest problem with people who don't drink is that Roose Bolton says he doesn't drink, right before he spoilerspoilerspoilerspoiler However, if you are a recovering alcoholic and don't plan on spoilerspoilerspoiler then I have no problem with it.

1

u/TVCasualtydotorg Jul 14 '15

I went from being a pretty big, messy, drinker to stopping last year. I got tired of not being able to stop, losing nights to blacking out, offending people, waking up worried I'd offended people, spending way too much money on alcohol without memory of doing so and the long, day killing hangovers.

Every time I hang out with people, the first question, before "how are you?" is "you still not drinking?" It is fucking irritating. And then someone always starts trying to pressure me to drink. This is why I've more or less stopped going out

1

u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15

it just doesn't make sense... going to a bar and not drinking.... It'd be like...

1

u/pobparker Jul 14 '15

Yay fun people who can DD!

1

u/Sineadphy Jul 14 '15

I used to drink really heavily and pretty often, but once I got to about 18 I just decided that I didn't like my lack of control when I was drunk etc and so decided to stop getting drunk but will still have a couple drink. Now 4 years later some of my friends still try to convince me to get drunk every single night we go out.

1

u/BenadrylCrumplebunch Jul 14 '15

I don't go out to bars unless I'm the designated driver. That way I can use that as an excuse instead of trying to argue with drunk people. My close friends don't have a problem with it thankfully. In fact, when I DD for them, they get drunk and tell me how awesome I am and buy me food.

1

u/buncatfarms Jul 14 '15

this was my entire 20s. every time i met new people or went out for a work function, it was a good 5 minute conversation on how i don't drink and don't i want to and they feel bad that i don't drink. and then i feel bad cause they probably think i'm judging them or looking down on them but its not that - my body just doesn't handle alcohol that well.

1

u/SuddenUrdge2PooP Jul 14 '15

My friend recently stopped drinking all together, and even though hes a great drinking partner and we have had great times drinking together, I am happy for him I kind of wish I had his discipline but hes still fun and will still go out and see a band with us and we pretty much have a permanent DD, haha!

1

u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15

I have a friend that doesn't drink and I accept that but he does it for the dumbest reason. He said he doesn't because his father is an angry drunk which therefore would make him an angry drunk. That logic... I would be understanding if he knew he becomes violent when drunk but I've know him since like 4th grade so I know he's never been drunk and he's very laid back to begin with.

1

u/devries Jul 14 '15

For many, participation in a culture--especially a drug-culture (like drinking alcohol or smoking weed, etc.)--is a strong litmus test for group solidarity in much the same way that not, say, "smoking the peace pipe around the natives" is around the campfire, literally and figuratively.

A lot of norms are packed into particpating in a drug culture; for many, explicit rejection of the drug offered ("let's get a beer together!") is taken to be an implicit rejection of them, their hobbies, values, etc. It's sad, but there are solid socio-cultural reasons why people are so offended or taken aback when others don't drink. It's like being in the Bible-Belt and saying to a Baptist, "I'll go to church with you, I guess, but I'm an atheist."

1

u/Stove_The_Appliance Jul 14 '15

My roommate is like this. He doesn't drink or do any drugs but we are friends with many people who do both. It's a constant struggle to remind them that while my roommate is coming to this party with us, he won't be drinking and nothing will convince him to do otherwise. We've had friends cut out of our circle because they've tried tricking him into drinking alcohol more than a few times.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15

Your post gave me a headache.
Almost drives me to drink.

1

u/PrettyLittleTruthers Jul 15 '15

Alcoholic in recovery here.

I've noticed that when people CARE that I don't drink, they probably have a drinking problem themselves. My non-alcoholic friends don't give a shit.

1

u/CripticSilver Jul 19 '15

I don't care if it's too late.

The reason I don't drink, is because I don't like anything I have tasted before. I don't find it annoying when somebody tries to make me drink, only if it is a drink I haven't tasted before. Because I'm willing to try new things, as long as I don't have to pay for it.

0

u/UncreativeTeam Jul 14 '15

I know there are legitimate reasons not to drink, but I can't help but feel paranoid around those people. It's weird when everyone's not at the same level of awareness/sobriety/drunkenness and a select few can remember everything with perfect recall...