Actually the rule dates from the middle ages, and is an advisory in manuals of etiquette (along with not wiping ones nose on the table cloth).
Theories are abound as to what significance is (or was) actually attributed to having ones elbows on the table. The most popular theories are:
Insulting the wealth and status of a host. It may have been construed that putting ones elbows on the table was to indirectly suggest that the host could not afford to flood the table with food, thus insulting their wealth, and by extension, their status
Stance. When you put your elbows on a table you automatically hunch over, or at least move in closer to the table. This could be taken in two different ways. First you may come across as angered, displeased, or violent, as hunching is a natural characteristic of being in the aforementioned moods, as is drawing closer to someone so as to invade their personal space. Second the suggestion is made that you yourself may be boorish, poorly educated and therefore not worth of your status as our ancient ancestors are (and were) often depicted hunched over food eating like animals.
Additional fun fact:
Manuals of etiquette that featured rules such as "do not steal the cutlery" and "do not wipe your nose on the table cloth" were actually aimed at the upper classes of the medieval age, by modern standards most medieval people of similar status would have atrocious table manners.
Edit: For those of you who have heard different reasoning behind the no elbows on the table rule, please do share! While the timings of my post are factually accurate, the reasonings are merely common speculation by historians. It's likely we'll never know the true answer, but reading the other reasons is fascinating!
I read a 1700s etiquette manual once, and it specifically said not to burp or "break wind" at the table-- and if you had to, at least turn to the side and do it discreetly. Also not to eat off other people's plates. I guess if people did that, they did need a manual.
Don't forget that's the 1700's. In the 12-1400's when these things were becoming popular they must have had some strange rules in, things that we take for granted now.
This makes a lot of sense. Where you position an empty glass or how you leave cutlery on a plate are all non-verbal indicators to servants signalling when you are finished with a plate or need more to drink.
I'd imagine it's also a status thing. Like you know somebody's high class because they know and abide rules of etiquette they were taught when young. If it was in an etiquette book that you had to walk backwards with your hands in the air when entering all buildings, you'd bet high class people would do it without question because it signals to others that they are more educated and wealthy than they are.
Though this is entirely a guess on my part and based on what I know of the way high born people in Game of Thrones try to pay strict attention to how they carry themselves because they have to separate themselves from the low born peasants.
Oh it's most definitely a status thing. Etiquette was (and is) a massive indicator of social status. Back in medieval England, if you could afford the tutoring and the books you were definitely someone worth knowing.
I remember reading Chuck Palahniuk's book, Survivor, it has all these really detailed rules of etiquette that the main character knows. Assuming that these were all actual rules, it was conveyed as a way to make those of low status look foolish. The rules were almost always outside of common sense, and needlessly intricate so that you would only get it right if you had been taught. It was a really good read.
In medieval Europe (where many of these etiquette rules were developed) pissing off the wrong people could have disastrous consequences. If you were a low level lord trying to impress a social superior knowing your etiquette could not only be a make or break, but could be the difference between life and death.
Well, unless you want to hang out with or otherwise impress people that might be offended. But if you don't think you'd be inclined to like them anyway, it's not a problem.
As a person who has a hard time not putting elbows on tables i can say that your statement about hunching is incorrect. People put elbows on the table because trying to sit straight without support either by leaning on the back of a chair or putting elbows on the table kills the lower back and makes one hunch
The one I feel is most likely: it's a display of confidence.
Being hunched over your food due to either bad posture or because you fear someone taking your food vs. sitting up and proper, leaving your food vulnerable to being taken... But you know no one would dare take it.
This is closer to what I assumed, a leftover of the table etiquette age. To be proper, you shouldn't have your elbows on the table because it doesn't make your posture look good. Usually, the table height in relation to the chair dictates whether or not I will have elbows on the table, also, what I'm eating. Burger or pizza, ELBOWS!
I would add that the hunched-over, elbows-on-the-table position is great for guarding your food; you sort of "box out" people who might be trying to steal something off your plate. (You see this stance in prison, for example.) I'm speculating, but perhaps more cultured tables didn't want to echo such vulgar behavior: "We're not the sort to tussle over the last dinner roll here at Castle Floppingdong, young squire; open your stance."
I think that would be an interesting decoration to have in a kitchen. An old-looking rule list from the middle ages that contains a rule "do not steal the cutlery."
I was told that it's not necessarily about your elbows, it's mostly that you shouldn't "shovel food into your mouth and the only way to shovel is to have your elbows on the table.
The Time Traveller's Guide to Medieval England? If you haven't read it, it tells you all sorts about this type of stuff. Things you don't get in a history book. Also has an interesting clothing chart which shows what you could and couldn't wear based on reputation and social status. Pick it up :) Or if you're in England, send me your address and I'll mail it over to you :) Sounds like you'd enjoy it.
I was told it was because there were always so many people at those tables with numerous utensils so it was basically impossible for anyone to physically put their elbows on the table without hitting stuff.
1.2k
u/[deleted] Jul 13 '15 edited Jul 14 '15
Actually the rule dates from the middle ages, and is an advisory in manuals of etiquette (along with not wiping ones nose on the table cloth).
Theories are abound as to what significance is (or was) actually attributed to having ones elbows on the table. The most popular theories are:
Insulting the wealth and status of a host. It may have been construed that putting ones elbows on the table was to indirectly suggest that the host could not afford to flood the table with food, thus insulting their wealth, and by extension, their status
Stance. When you put your elbows on a table you automatically hunch over, or at least move in closer to the table. This could be taken in two different ways. First you may come across as angered, displeased, or violent, as hunching is a natural characteristic of being in the aforementioned moods, as is drawing closer to someone so as to invade their personal space. Second the suggestion is made that you yourself may be boorish, poorly educated and therefore not worth of your status as our ancient ancestors are (and were) often depicted hunched over food eating like animals.
Additional fun fact:
Manuals of etiquette that featured rules such as "do not steal the cutlery" and "do not wipe your nose on the table cloth" were actually aimed at the upper classes of the medieval age, by modern standards most medieval people of similar status would have atrocious table manners.
Edit: For those of you who have heard different reasoning behind the no elbows on the table rule, please do share! While the timings of my post are factually accurate, the reasonings are merely common speculation by historians. It's likely we'll never know the true answer, but reading the other reasons is fascinating!