on Saturday when i wake up and have my house clean by 8am, i am damn well gonna sit down, have a beer or two, then crank the AC and take a fucking nap. my co-workers found out and were shocked. what does the time of day have ANYTHING to do with enjoying a beer or two? if it becomes a problem, a daily thing, something that i need to function... then i have a problem.
I think it stems from people thinking that you NEED a drink to be able to function, rather than just wanting to relax and enjoy a couple of drinks. Every year, I go on an obligatory beach trip with my family, my dad and his wife are pretty conservative, and my two sisters and their husbands act conservative when they're around my dad. Somebody will always say something to me if I crack a beer at 10 or 11am like I am some huge alcoholic or something. I always just give them a smartass comment in return like, "gee, I sure hope this won't interfere with me sitting in the sand and sweating!" It's also funny to me how, in their minds, there's a big difference in drinking a beer at 11am vs noon. They also like to judge if we're all at a restaurant and I'm the only one who orders a drink/beer, like I'm "drinking alone." My wife's family, on the other hand - they're Colombian and don't give a shit what I do at any point in the day, so it's kind of a no-brainer why I spend more time with them..
There's so much stigma in that, too. Like the only reason you'd ever have alcohol is as a social lubricant. Sometimes after a long day at work, I have the house to myself and I want pizza -- and beer goes great with pizza.
I'll go one further: being drunk alone. Obviously if it's a frequent occurrence, then it's a big red flag of a substance abuse problem. But if I live a healthy, solid life, why is there anything wrong with me mixing up a strong drink or a few and getting nice and toasty by myself as I watch Planet Earth or try to write 'profound' drunken poetry? I do this probably a few times a year, and I make great company for drunken me!
I experienced something similar on my annual camping trip. We just spend the days floating on rafts and playing fetch in the lake with the dogs. It is such a care-free environment, and we'll be drinking beers all day. One year my brother came and brought his wife. She got upset when someone offered her a beer with breakfast. Then she saw us all having breakfast beers and started chastising us for drinking so early. None of us are alcoholics, we don't drink until the evenings in our regular lives, but bitch when we're camping and floating on an inflatable raft is my plans for the day, I'm gonna enjoy a breakfast beer.
My family is Christian conservatives so I never drink around them. Or do anything of the sort. I love my family, but in a lot of ways they don't know the real me, nor do I want them to. I can't imagine telling them I'm an atheist and don't but into any of their beliefs since like 9th grade...
To them, there is a time and a place for it. Sometimes I'll wake up at 5pm and have a beer with my food (read: breakfast), and somehow that's more acceptable than the guy who's been awake for three hours when he has a beer at 10pm
Why on earth would you tell your co-workers this? Substance abuse counselors are some of the most judgemental people ever. I guess they kinda have to be
I mean sure, I do what I want too but I don't tell my mother I smoked at least half my paychecks in weed over the course of college because I don't want to have never ending grief.
He can do whatever he wants, but if he wants his co-workers to not judge him, then he should also want to not tell them about his day-drinking. It not horribly complicated.
That's funny because a number of my friends work in addiction and mental health and they are frequent, but very responsible, users of drugs (LSD, pot, mushrooms, etc). They are very conscious of when, how and why they use.
I think it actually makes them better at their jobs to have a moderate perspective on drug use, and they fully recognize that each person has an individualized relationship to these substances so no single rule can apply to everyone.
because when you get down to it, i dont give two shits what anyone thinks of me other than my parents and my wife. my self esteem is mine, and if i want a beer at 8am, i will have a beer. :)
Omg tell me about it. My mother is a social worker and worked with AlAnon for a while. I was 28 before I felt comfortable having even a single drink around her, with all the questions and interrogation I went through every time. I mean, I understand taking drinking seriously, but damn.
Former social worker here. Worked in child welfare (NOT CPS) for 3 years. I never, EVER, thought about sharing my marijuana habits with my co-workers. The misinformation in the field is mind blowing.
Hell, if it were me, I'd be telling them about all the things they assume I'm doing anyways. Counselors aren't all prudes. My current coke connection used to do addictions counseling for at risk youth. He stopped doing it when he got depressed and his coke habit got worse.
Maybe depends on the setting. Most of the ones I know aren't phased unless your injecting heroin into your eye during your lunch break. The bar is just so much lower than weekend beer
We had a substance abuse counselor come into one of those meetings you have during your first week of college. I was a pretty boring kid and hadn't even really drank excessively and certainly hadn't done any drugs by the time I was 18. They were going around, trying to get folks to share stories about how they did one of these things so they could 'counsel' them.
Dude got MAD at me for not having one of these stories and accused me of lying. Like, it is possible that an 18 year old, particularly an 18 year old at a seven sisters college, got to that age without dabbling in drugs or serious binge drinking and they shouldn't be yelled at for such a thing.
That's ridiculous, sorry that guy was a douche to you. Honestly you should be commended for not trying drugs and alcohol before that she. Your developing brain thanks you!
I'm a mental health counselor, but many of our patients have substance abuse problems too. One of the nurses I work with told me that marijuana is the "worst drug in the world" (exact words) and that is causes psychotic disorders. He doesn't know I smoke after work, oops.
That's sad. =/ Marijuana absolutely can exacerbate psychotic disorders (or take a predisposed person and tip them over the edge), as components of it (mainly THC) are hallucinogenic, but... if the person didn't have (or wasn't about to have) a psychotic disorder to begin with, having a toke after work sure isn't going to cause it!
WTF? So, I guess meth is basically aspirin? It's bad enough that this kind of misinformation exists, let alone in the minds of educated health care professionals.
Well in my experience, and I've had a lot of experience with this group, they are very judgemental when comes to alcohol and drugs. It makes total sense, as it's their line of work. I'm not saying it's necessarily a bad thing, it's just something I've noticed.
But thanks for being condescending, you're awesome
My mother is a substance abuse counselor. I've never seen her say a word about anyone drinking at any time, unless they did have a known addiction, or they were drinking to excess.
Hell, at her work's Christmas "White Elephant" party there were about 10 substance abuse counselors, and almost every gift had wine of some sort, or a little bottle of something hard.
I've heard them say it's not for them to judge other people, but to help them get better. "Just because you have a problem I don't, doesn't mean I'm any better than you are."
My friends have this no booze before 5 thing that I just don't get. It's been a long week at work, if I want to sip whiskey while doing my homework at 11 Saturday morning, move over I'm making a stiff old fashioned.
Yeah, thats the bomb. Wake up Saturday morning, pour myself a vodka and orange juice, and clean the house. Then you're sitting in a nice clean house, a little buzzed, throw on a good tv show and snooze. Perfect Saturday.
I used to always save a little beer from the night before on the bed stand next to me. Morning-Beer, as it became known, was the best thing for getting the stale beer taste out of your mouth from the night before if you intended to lie in bed for a bit before getting up.
It was the vodka on the cornflakes that became the problem though.
Thank you!!! I thought it was weird to have a beer in the shower at 9am. I fucking love beer and drink whenever i want, but never when it would cause problems (work, driving etc..) your comment reassured me it is fine.
Would you extend this mindset to every drug? If there are people who can use heroin in a way that doesn't debilitate their life, do they have a problem? It's a long shot, but definitely possible. I'm in treatment for substance abuse because I had a few pills of adderall I wasn't prescribed and all I hear is how much of a problem I have with drugs. I'm just like, "dude I used them here and there when they were available, I was never dependent." No one cares about that, I'm just another addict in the system.
i know i am a different type of addictions counsellor, and it has gotten me in trouble with my bosses before, but here is a comment i made a while back
the problem i run into is when people are not honest with themselves. be honest with yourself about your use. if you honestly only use occasionally and it is not impacting major life areas, then why worry? focus on improving the other areas of your life and you might notice you dont even need the adderall at all! i would like people to be drug and medication free.
but that isnt my call, that is your call, i find healthy living to be a much better high than any drug, and i occasionally use alcohol to relax/enjoy/reward but the 48 beer i bought on Thursday will probably last at my house for 2 months unless i have people over.
We need more people like you in the system man. I never thought I had a problem with drugs, I used sporadically. It never took a toll on my health, responsibilities, anything. But now, it has basically boiled down to putting my head down and saying how addicted to drugs I was because I must be wrong if I got a possession charge.
Major life areas as i mentioned are what you need to look at. in my organization we boiled it down to these
1: Education
2: Employment
3: Family
4: Financial
5: Legal
6: Leisure
7: Mental Health
8: Physical Health
9: Relationships (friends and such)
10: spirituality (major changes in beliefs)
if you noticed that there were impacts to any of those areas, i would look at how you can improve your life. life is a balance, find some healthy hobbies. :)
I've got plenty of hobbies. The only struggles I have are 4 and 5, but a BS in psychology gets you nowhere these days, so hopefully an advanced degree will help. But I'd say that's a good list. Keep on doing what you're doing man.
Good for you. I went to see an addictions counselor preemptively as part of making a court case go more smoothly.
He asked how much I'd drank when I visited my friend at a bar, and when I said a beer, and the single shot of whiskey poured for me free that I thought it polite to drink, he asked if I had caught a buzz from it. He said that anyone who has ever gotten a buzz from drinking is an alcoholic. He couldn't define catching a buzz, or what the limit was, and he couldn't explain how someone could know what their personal limit was or what an appropriate amount was without ever having caught a buzz. The whole thing was a joke, and he was clearly there to line someone's pockets (possibly his own from the pictures of him on a boat around his office). It was ridiculous. Dude has an addiction to judging people.
we have a nice screening tool we use to see if someone has concerns with alcohol (btw, i do not use alcoholic as it is a negative connotation label, i prefer my clients to be empowered to make better choices in life than to resort to "i'm an alcoholic, what did you expect" type mentality)
anyhow, the screening tool has 24 questions used to help us find an intensity to work with you on. question 1 is "the last time you drank, how much did you drink? A: enough to get high or less b: enough to get drunk C: enough to pass out
this is ONE question, with a weight of 2 out of 47, for a SCREENING TOOL, not a diagnostics tool, which do not exist in addictions counselling, because all clients are different.
i dont make a killing doing what i like, but i like it, it is fun, and i find it easy, some people in private counselling (i find more and more americans do not like addictions counsellors because they are fee for service most often) do it for the money. i dont own a boat... i own two vehicles, one is paid off... i got new goalie gear 8 days ago, that was a nice treat for selling my house and getting a cheaper place... you need to find a new counsellor... that guy is a tool...
Yeah, definitely did not continue to see him. Went two sessions, he signed some papers for my lawyer after agreeing that we didn't see eye to eye. I figured after dealing with rampant heroin addiction and people with actual alcohol problems (everyone else in the waiting room was a heroin addict, it's big in my city), someone like me who ended up with a "guilt by association" charge because someone with me ha a little pot he'd not be overbearing and stupid about it, but he was definitely immediately under the impression that everything I said was a lie and that I must be an addict. It was pretty disgusting. His logic was that because I was there I must have a major problem, and that the fact that I had a legal issue meant that it was interfering with my livelihood, with no consideration of circumstance or that the law might be the issue. There's plenty of people for whom someone like you is a major help, it's just a shame that some are so gung-ho about everyone seeing them definitely having a major issue. Can't blame the profession for one quack though, certainly.
On a personal note, my stuff was all null processed and expunged quickly, because it was bullshit in a bullshit legal system, but a guy like him couldn't accept that eventuality.
I think there has been some study pointing that a good indicator for one's propensity to alcoholism is when they start drinking in the day, and starting the day with a drink/beer does make one far more inclined to alcoholism.
This is merely an indicator and not proof of alcoholism. Addiction and susbtance abuse is (generally) poorly understood, so your friends might just be dumb. Me personally, I look for 'the shakes' when seeing if someone is an alcoholic.
I felt this way after finishing all the yard work yesterday, at 9:30 am. I get up really early to get it done so that I'm not sweating balls at noon or later. It's my Sunday, I can be drunk by noon if I've done my chores (not that I did or that I was) :)
People give me shit because I eat leftovers for breakfast. I don't want pancakes when I wake up, and I don't have enough time to cook bacon. So fuck it, I'll eat these leftover buffalo wings.
Why does the time of day dictate what I can eat/ drink?
Isn't the whole point of addictions counseling to recognize when something is interfering with a person's life and when it's not? What's up with your coworkers?
what does the time of day have ANYTHING to do with enjoying a beer or two?
Well, you know why. Because most people have responsibilities they need to take care of during the day, and being drunk means you won't be able to fulfill them adequately.
The issue is whether or not you actually have responsibilities that day, but it's easy to see how most people would be surprised that you're starting that early, because presumably you do have some that you're thus neglecting.
The difference is you do it on a weekend. If you're at work and cracking a beer at 11, that's probably a problem. Unless you work in a brewery as a taste tester. But desk job? Beer in the morning is bad. But hell, drink your beer after doing some chores. It's your life.
Ha-ha, you sound like my dad. Do you practice harm reduction techniques, and if yes have you noticed a better recidivism rate than your colleagues who preach abstinence?
totally harm reduction. i am one of three counsellors with a 100% satisfaction from clients for every year i have worked... :) i specialize in high risk clients. but in January i moved and am now working normal population... i never knew that this job was so easy... :)
Yes. I work night shift so my 7pm is your 7am. It's a nightcap for me. Not all the time, but my schedule is completely opposite so I'm gonna have that beer on the porch while you have to sit in rush hour.
some of us just cant sleep in... i actually was able to sleep till 9:30 on saturday last week, but i also moved on my own and have been running ragged for 2 weeks... :)
Historically, beer actually use to be a breakfast beer, due to the high number of calories. Imagine sitting down with a full english breakfast and a pint of a heavy german beer and you'll get the picture.
nope. :) but i also have so much education around substances that i could never imagine using anything other than an occasional beer. we joke about using crack, but that's never serious. :)
I used to work nightshifts and people would have a dig at me because I would get home after work at around 7am and have a beer or two while watching something before sleeping. The body doesn't magically convert alcohol into crippling addiction just because it is morning.
Addiction counselors tend to be a bit jumpy with that kind of thing. I idly said something to a room full of them about how I had cut myself, which was met with a concerned intervention trying to get me to seek help for my self-harm. When I said I meant I accidentally got a cut, I got a 5 minute lecture on why I shouldn't joke about self-harm. I wasn't even joking...
Can you come to PA so I can have you as a counselor. Court ordered counseling because of being busted for weed is a pain. I quit cold turkey when I was caught and had no problem functioning, I think that's proof enough of a lack of an addiction.
Likewise, I'm going to enjoy a nice glass of red with my dinner after my last day of work for the week, who cares if that means I'm opening a bottle at 7am on a Tuesday morning, I work the graveyard shift and that's the start of my weekend.
Couple of my coworkers used to get so much shit from their local bottle shop because every Friday morning, 8am, they'd be in there getting some beers.
Clearly some terrible drinking problem. Clearly. Clearly not because our shifts were 11pm-8am and friday morning was our friday night and we'd toss back a few while doing the weekly windup.
My co workers all drink more than me and i'm 24 and a substance abuse counselor. Pretty much all weekend drinkers, where as i might have 1 beer a week, and then proceed to nap.
a beer or two on saturday morning normally takes 2 hours of my time, i have been up since 5 am, at 10 i can take a nap and back up to be productive by 11, :)
It probably stems from the negative social stigma of being an alcoholic and going STRAIGHT to the bottle when you wake up. Perhaps the association with relaxing and drinking to do so and then being in a time where hard work was all you did be doing and not relaxing, 20s through 60s sort of idea. I'm just spitballing here but I'm sure it stems from something old.
The fact that you find beer to be a reward shows you are already addicted in my opinion. Beer tastes like piss water that no one enjoys when they first try it. You had to drink enough beers to chemically alter your brain to enjoy the taste and to view it as a reward for a hard days work. That alone to me says you are addicted to beer so I don't care if you are enjoying it at 3AM, 11AM, 3PM, or 11PM, its all a bad sign.
Lets see, you started off disliking beer and now you receive a pleasurable effect from beer. Sounds like your brain is fucked up due to overuse of alcohol to the point where your brain isn't the shit taste of beer properly and you now associate the shit taste as a reward.
you cherry picked a sentence and did not look at the entire article, you also skipped over the previous paragraph, the first one, in the link that stated exactly what i did,
so essentially, you chose a sentence from a definition that is not the complete form of the definition, ignoring the other sections of the exact multifaceted definition to try and make your point. the sentence after the one you quoted gives more clarity to the definition of addiction, and ignore ALL other aspects of what makes an addiction an addiction. such as continued use despite harm to major life areas, such as
1: Education
2: Employment
3: Family
4: Financial
5: Legal
6: Leisure
7: Mental Health
8: Physical Health
9: Relationship (such as friendships and co-workers)
10: Spirituality
but hey, keep on keeping on, i will stay at my 90 grand a year job that i earned with my degree in Addictions Counselling, which is a Bachelor of Health Science, from the University of Lethbridge which is one of the few Universities that offers a four year degree.
And you can stay on the other side of the internet, using faulty quotes to try and back a flawed view of the world that is possibly skewed by being personally impacted by addictions, either your own use, or someone close to you. either way, you might want to try some form of counselling, and maybe attempt to remove the foggy veil you are viewing addiction with.
but hey, keep on keeping on, i will stay at my 90 grand a year job that i earned with my degree in Addictions Counselling, which is a Bachelor of Health Science, from the University of Lethbridge which is one of the few Universities that offers a four year degree.
Wow, you are such a piece of shit you have to try to bring up your degree of how much money you make as some sort of defense. Am I suppose to be impresses by your pay, your degree from some university I never heard of, or the fact that you ignored the definition in order to try to deny that you are addicted to beer? But please keep telling yourself that stuff matters as you once again go and drink a beer due to your addiction to it.
The degree, wage, university are to show that yes, in fact i do know what i am talking of, enough so that i am being paid an above average salary to do what i do.
also, note that i did not ignore your definition, i used the complete definition, not some segment of the definition. the segment you chose is to show that physical symptoms of addiction also is able to be social or triggered by environmental cues, not only consumption. aka, walking past a liquor store creating cravings, a tobacco user associating coffee and a cigarette and every time they have a coffee they have a craving for nicotine.
it is a section, there is more to it.
but hey, judge me all you want, i do not care. i know my life better than you ever will. i also understand how addiction manifests and continues to develop over time.
Bullshit. You responded multiple times and again tried to prove what a badass you are by listing your wages, degree/university, etc to make your e-penis bigger. But please go back to having to drink beer to make yourself feel better.
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u/pyro5050 Jul 13 '15
Addictions Counsellor here
on Saturday when i wake up and have my house clean by 8am, i am damn well gonna sit down, have a beer or two, then crank the AC and take a fucking nap. my co-workers found out and were shocked. what does the time of day have ANYTHING to do with enjoying a beer or two? if it becomes a problem, a daily thing, something that i need to function... then i have a problem.