r/AskReddit Jul 13 '15

What socially unacceptable things are you OK with?

8.4k Upvotes

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1.7k

u/Indy12 Jul 13 '15

Wow, I have dwarfism as well and I have never had this problem. My friends and family are always trying to get me to date normal people, or whoever I want I suppose. Also, from a genetics standpoint, if you don't have achondroplasia, which is one of the few dominate ones I believe, then the dwarfism is usually recessive. By dating another dwarf, you are only increasing the odds of your children having a disability as well.

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u/[deleted] Jul 13 '15

[deleted]

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u/Indy12 Jul 13 '15

Nope, I'm a guy. I've got morquio syndrome though, not that people tend to differentiate a ton between dwarfisms.

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u/FictionalFear Jul 13 '15

Are there visual difference in the different forms of dwarfism? I had no idea there were different forms and now I am curious.

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u/[deleted] Jul 13 '15

[deleted]

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u/CopyRogueLeader Jul 13 '15

Do you know what specific types of Dwarfism they have?

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u/Pokez Jul 13 '15

Peter Dinklage has Achondroplasia. While Verne Troyer has a much rarer condition known as Cartilage–hair hypoplasia. I'm just basing this off wikipedia, but /u/vernetroyer is also a pretty active redditor, if he wanted to chime in.

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u/ridicalis Jul 14 '15

/u/vernetroyer won me over with his shark costume, and quickly found himself one of the few celebs I actually care to pay attention to. Yes, active redditor and a good contributor to the site.

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u/bolognese1 Jul 14 '15

well damn. TIL.

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u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15

He's made the front page a few times. Funny guy.

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u/[deleted] Jul 13 '15

[deleted]

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u/Shaysdays Jul 14 '15

Meredith Eaton, who people are also familiar with, has pseudoachondroplasia.

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u/Bigirishjuggalo1 Jul 14 '15

Friend met her while on a trip to LA and came back telling us how nice and friendly she was. Beautiful woman as well. :)

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u/burrito987 Jul 14 '15

I enjoyed her in Boston Legal, very funny

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u/Ananasboat Jul 14 '15

Meredith Eaton

It's funny, because on an episode of House she was on, her daughter had "fake dwarfism" and Meredith had Achondroplasia. It's interesting.

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u/Karzoth Jul 13 '15

It's odd, I'd never considered it but now you put it like that it's incredibly obvious.

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u/dragontail Jul 13 '15

Same here.

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u/KeijyMaeda Jul 14 '15

I just looked them up for comparison and now I am aware that Peter Dinklage is much taller than Verne Troyer, in comparison.

I also realize the differences now.

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u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15

Not to mention that when it comes to women, Verne Troyer has mad game.

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u/tmpick Jul 14 '15

Yeah, I'm sure Peter Dinklage wouldn't be hurting for female companionship.

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u/evoic Jul 14 '15

Perfect response and example for the average Joe to grasp the concept.

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u/Golgon3 Jul 13 '15

Peter - Dwarf.

Verne - Halfling.

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u/[deleted] Jul 13 '15

[deleted]

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u/FicklePickle13 Jul 14 '15

Dinklages accent is weird in the context of psuedo-English accents but is very consistent. I could see it believably being a mild speech impediment on the characters' part.

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u/Urban_Viking Jul 13 '15

Yeah Peter is like a Fantasy dwarf fat and small but Verne is more like a gnome or something because hes smaller.

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u/LibraryGeek Jul 13 '15

Huuuuge differences. One of the biggest is in whether your trunk is of average/near average size and your extremities are shortened (achondroplasia) or if you trunk is dwarfed with longer arms/legs (my weirdly rare but dominant form of dwarfism) Also whether your skull and spine are involved. Note that these all are types of dwarfism that involve skeletal proportions that are "not normal".

If the dwarfism is caused by hormonal issues, you will get a person with no skeletal problems, just tiny.

There are...over two hundred forms of dwarfism :) we are..legion!

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u/JurassicArc Jul 13 '15

Two hundred? I thought there were only seven.

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u/ColsonIRL Jul 13 '15

Hey-oh

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u/JurassicArc Jul 13 '15

I think you mean "Hi-ho".

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u/Veggiemon Jul 13 '15

jesus, do people with dwarfism have to deal with puns like this IRL? I'd punch someone. then again i'm a little grumpy.

4

u/kjata Jul 13 '15

"Lali-ho!" is also correct.

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u/LordoftheSynth Jul 14 '15

It's all fun and games until the princess lets her fucking dolls run amok.

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u/RedRoronoa Jul 14 '15

I.. I thought it was just the two..

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u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15

So this might be an odd question, but does there exist bigotry between different types of dwarf?

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u/Ysmildr Jul 14 '15

So... If a person has achondroplasia, is it plausible that you could cut off their arms and legs and replace them with bionics and they'd be a relatively normal size? Assuming skull and spine are not involved.

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u/Metalyellow Jul 14 '15

The bones that form the cranial base (bottom of the skull) actually have cartilage precursors, so the skull is affected in achondroplasia.

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u/cara123456789 Jul 14 '15

I think some people get the arm and leg lenghtining surgeries which makes them almost a regular height

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u/solely_magnus Jul 14 '15

weirdly rare but dominant form of dwarfism

what's it called

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u/Satanic_Earmuff Jul 13 '15

Am I the only one who thought trunk was innuendo?

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u/Kahmeleon Jul 13 '15

Nope, but then again, I'm an ass.

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u/laconicsherpa Jul 14 '15

right? ARE WE NOT DOING PHRASING ANYMORE?

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u/drunky_crowette Jul 14 '15

Nope. I got really excited about Peter Dinklage for a minute there

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u/SubcommanderMarcos Jul 14 '15

There are...over two hundred forms of dwarfism :) we are..legion!

Ho shit, til

That's kinda awesome, actually

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u/ginfish Jul 13 '15

I feel like you know enough about dwarfism that i should ask you this question.

I suppose men with dwarfism are affected... you know... at all zones of their bodies. (I truly don't know how to formulate this without possibly offending someone or google this without fear of something finding this somehow in my search history).

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u/Umbos Jul 13 '15

Haven't you read A Song of Ice and Fire? Between the legs, Tyrion is made no differently than any other man.

No, but seriously, most dwarfism is caused by a genetic mutation that only affects the skeleton. Anything not made of cartilage or bone is not affected.

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u/ThePlanckConstant Jul 14 '15

That's a lot of dong for a little guy.

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u/Shaysdays Jul 14 '15

Maybe, maybe not. "The same as average size men" means they can run the gamut.

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u/Roast_A_Botch Jul 14 '15

It's relative though. A 6' man with a 6" dong will look tiny but that same dong on a 3" man looks much bigger.

It's the same as how your dong looks bigger in a 6-year olds hand.

→ More replies

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u/ginfish Jul 14 '15

Thanks, i truly didnt know and that's just a weird question to ask... so yeah...

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u/LibraryGeek Jul 19 '15

I think my father is average sized there, even though he is mayyyyyybe 4'9". I've heard jokes about Acon (acondroplastic) men being "tripods" so....take that as you will I guess!

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u/xDialtone Jul 13 '15

Must be popular at D&D gatherings.

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u/LibraryGeek Jul 19 '15

Ha! I like to play as a gelfling for obvious reasons :) A Rogue gelfling to be more precise :)

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u/Jov_West Jul 13 '15 edited Jul 13 '15

Are there just as many females with Dwarfism as males? It seems like males are more common.

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u/LibraryGeek Jul 14 '15

Yes there are there just fewer crazy little women a la Little Man lol when I went to little people get togethers (many moons ago) there were often more girls than guys. I don't have specific numbers for you though. It is possible that some of the recessive types favor one gender.

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u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15

[deleted]

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u/moeru_gumi Jul 14 '15

5'7" counts? Jesus, I'm 5'3".

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u/knuggles_da_empanada Jul 14 '15

I think OP is either trolling or misinformed. Googling shows that the line they draw is 4'10 after puberty. You're not a dwarf.

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u/Roast_A_Botch Jul 14 '15

5'7" is not dwarfism. You can have that condition, but if you're over 4'10" after puberty, you're not a dwarf. Hell, you'd be a tall girl and only a couple inches under average height male. I'm sure it sucks being short, but you're not that short.

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u/knuggles_da_empanada Jul 14 '15

Jeez 5'7 isn't freakishly short and I'm assuming you're a straight guy and as a 5'7 girl I am considered on the taller side and I'd say about 80% of women I see are shorter than me by like 2 inches at least. I'm skeptical because how the heck could that be considered "dwarf" by any standards? They're just being mean, if you're being serious.

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u/Roast_A_Botch Jul 14 '15

The cut-off is under 4'10" after puberty.

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u/drunky_crowette Jul 14 '15

You are literally just a few inches shy of average. You aren't a dwarf, at most you're a dummy.

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u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15

[deleted]

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u/drunky_crowette Jul 14 '15

The definition of dwarfism says 4'10 or below.

How does that make me an ass?

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u/cutanddried Jul 13 '15

huuuuge.

Dwarfism...

no one?...

1

u/LordoftheSynth Jul 14 '15

Dwarfism is only huge if you're a Super Dwarf.

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u/CrisisOfConsonant Jul 13 '15

Just a random question for you since you said dwarfism. How do most people who have dwarfism feel about the phrase "little people"? My understanding is that is the politically correct nomenclature. But, as someone with no skin in the game, that seems like a really clunky way to describe yourself.

Is that really what most people with dwarfism want to be called or is that like the vocal minority pushing that?

Honestly I can see why people might not want to be called dwarves, as it may conjure images of folk creatures. But why did midget go out of style? To me it seems to have no connotations aside from stature.

So I know you probably have to answer these questions all the time. I don't mean malice or to annoy, but I figure it's not something I can understand from a Google search.

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u/ligyn Jul 13 '15 edited Jul 13 '15

I can't remotely claim to speak for most people with dwarfism, and yes, "little person" is supposedly the preferred phrase, but a friend of mine with dwarfism absolutely hates this term.

He's a guy in his 30s... I would imagine that many adult men might not like the idea of "little" anything being part of a label for them. The way he sees it is that he has a medical condition, and he'd rather it be called by its appropriate medical term: dwarfism. Other people view it less medically and more as a part of their core identity, and I suppose that's why they prefer "little people".

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u/_Doh_ Jul 14 '15

"Little people" always sounds patronising to me. I don't see what's wrong with referring to someone with dwarfism as "a person with dwarfism".

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u/thenichi Jul 14 '15

Where does imp fall on the scale?

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u/FicklePickle13 Jul 14 '15

It seems an odd thing to nitpick, but all the stuff I'm reading on dwarfism is very insistent that the correct plural form is 'dwarfs'.

Apparently 'dwarves' was a very uncommon variant until Tolkien got his books out there, and is pretty much always properly used when speaking about the fantasy creatures.

They also say that when speaking of relative size, 'f's are in order, i.e., "The elephant dwarfs it's greatest fear, the common field mouse."

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u/kjata Jul 13 '15

I believe that "midget" just means you're scaled down, whereas dwarfism encompasses a large subset of atypical proportions. Although, to be completely honest, I have no particular knowledge on the subject, so get a second opinion.

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u/FicklePickle13 Jul 14 '15

It did used to be used in that context, but only ever saw common usage, never in any medical field. It's basically impossible to separate 'midget' from where it was born, being used by the Middle Class in the early 19th century to equate people with more aesthetically pleasing forms of dwarfism with children, and circuses and sideshows.

0

u/sgtzee Jul 14 '15

Read that as mosquito syndrome...Sorry...

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u/Familiastone Jul 13 '15 edited Jul 13 '15

Can I be the really tall guy in this party, pleeeeeease?

Edit: Guess not... :(

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u/El-Wrongo Jul 13 '15

This question might seem a bit rude, if so I apologise . Would you have a kid if you knew it would also be a dwarf?

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u/Indy12 Jul 13 '15

If I knew they would have the same kind I have, I would have to really consider it. I'm pretty happy with my life, but I went through at least 6 major surgeries to get me here, most while I was pretty young. That's a lot to deal with, and I don't know if I would want to put that on someone else.

That being said, I just started a brand new enzyme infusion therapy that could effectively cure my type of dwarfism if taken at a young age. It's too late to cure mine, but if I had a kid with my condition, they might have a pretty solid shot at a normal life with next to no symptoms.

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u/NotMyCircus Jul 14 '15

May I ask, this new enzyme, what are the results from taking it as an adult?

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u/Indy12 Jul 14 '15

For starters, it's improving my endurance/how far I can walk. Used to only be able to walk about 300ft before, now I can make it about 500ft, and thats after taking the enzyme for a year. It also reduces the issues my joints could develop later in life, so I shouldn't have joint pain when I'm older. It may do other things, but it's so new that no one really knows.

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u/[deleted] Jul 13 '15

[deleted]

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u/SinnerOfAttention Jul 13 '15

I need more short people friends. I have zero.

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u/lordnahte2 Jul 13 '15

Don't seek out people with dwarfism like Pokémon. With friends, its not "gotta catch 'em all". The common one is having "a black friend". For some reason people try to act so progressive by saying they have a black friend. The best way to make friends is like so: 1 find someone you enjoy being around 2 be friends. What they look like, have, don't have, want, don't want, is all irrelevant.

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u/fakestamaever Jul 13 '15

You teach me, and I'll teach you

1

u/Kenny__Loggins Jul 13 '15

I kind of assume from the comment that he is a dwarf as well.

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u/PlayMp1 Jul 13 '15

It's mostly new people I meet or comments from strangers I interact with.

That seems weird to me. Why shouldn't a dwarf date an average height person? Hell, if she were cute, I'd ask a dwarf out, no problem. I'm sure it's a really god damn annoying issue to have as a dwarf, but as far as "disabilities" go, it seems pretty bearable compared to, say, deafness or blindness. I know if I had to pick a disability, it would be dwarfism. Everyone loves dwarfs.

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u/-Mountain-King- Jul 13 '15

I suspect that's a result of the same social belief that women should date men that are taller than them.

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u/forgetfulnymph Jul 14 '15

I didn't even consider dwarves as a possibility of random redditor

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u/NotMyCircus Jul 14 '15

It's like realizing how diverse reddit is when reading some of those /r/askreddit threads that call for "____ of reddit:" and scores of people respond. My favorite was one about divorce lawyers. Who knew there were so many in our community? Let alone who happen to see the post.

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u/nixity Jul 13 '15

Can I ask a curious - but potentially dumb - genetics question then?

Without getting into the Wiki grind of it, based on /u/Indy12 saying the Achon is dominant, how is it that average-sized parents would give birth to an Achon child?

Is it literally a point-mutation that occurs in those cases? If so.. that's actually incredibly fascinating!

Edit: Also, as an aside, for what it's worth, even for average sized adults females typically prefer taller men. So I think it's probably "easier" for females with dwarfism to date average-sized males because it's almost status quo already. My roomie in college was 6ft (female) and constantly upset over the fact that shorter men never wanted to date her, even though she was more than open to it.

3

u/gunnersgottagun Jul 14 '15

There's actually a lot of diseases that predominantly exist due to de novo (aka new) mutations (think anything dominant where the person with it wouldn't survive to have their own children).

You can also get the case where mutations happened in cells that went on to form lots of the later sperm, so all those sperm cells carry to random mutation that didn't actually run in the family, but the dad now might father multiple kids with. It does complicate things when the first time the family gets told it was just a random chance mutation, and then the next kid has the same thing, and we need to then explain this aspect to them.

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u/daltsteve Jul 14 '15 edited Jul 14 '15

This is actually a huge phenomenon that body scholars investigate. Another similar thing that happens is people who use wheelchairs for mobility dating others who use wheelchairs. This literature is pretty interesting.

Edit: also, a lot of women with dwarfism are hyper-fetishized which definitely impacts this stigma differently for different genders.

1

u/Thoctar Jul 14 '15

Which is ironic because dwarf men dating women are more likely to be closer in height, that's just weird.

3

u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15

[deleted]

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u/masstrespass Jul 14 '15

I'm legitimately shocked to hear this, that people insist on imposing this already-asinine standard on dwarfs, of all people. Honestly, I have always just assumed that dwarfs almost never ended up dating each other, because that's a miniscule dating pool and what are the chances? Maybe I've just been underestimating the size of the community though?

1

u/MisterVega Jul 14 '15

Probably because women tend to be shorter than men anyway, and I’m sure there are women out there that don’t have dwarfism that are just as short.

-2

u/Gonzobot Jul 14 '15

There's a lot more female dwarf pornstars than male dwarf pornstars. Not gonna say that's the science behind it, but I'm sure actual science would find results somewhere between correlation and causation.

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u/FicklePickle13 Jul 14 '15

I'm guessing that's because most porn is marketed towards men, and most females in porn are already objectified to the hilt by their target audience. The males are usually supposed to be identified with by the audience to some degree, so not wanting the object of fetishization to also be the object of identification, they have the 'thing' that classifies the porn (BBW, MILF, blondes, redheads, librarians, dwarfs) be the woman.

One can also extend this into same-sex porn by taking these roles and applying them based on who is acting at the moment and who is merely reacting to what is done to them. Most porn doesn't have things more complicated than one person doing things and the other laying there and moaning about how awesome it is.

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u/noctrnalsymphony Jul 14 '15

Since women are 'smaller' I think it's viewed as more OK. I have a friend who is not a dwarf but at 5' is below average height, his girlfriend is 5'9" and even they get weird looks.

3

u/bool_idiot_is_true Jul 13 '15

I'm no expert but I'm sure I've heard that some forms of dominant dwarfism having two dominant alleles is fatal for the fetus.

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u/princess_of_sheba Jul 14 '15

Yeah, two parents with achondroplasia have a 25% chance of having a child who won't survive pregnancy.

3

u/Bennyboy1337 Jul 13 '15

I was going to ask if you're a male of female, because I think there is a stigma again males dating taller women, but for women it's okay; so anyways I checked your post history to get an idea, now seeing how much you talk about DnD makes wonder if you role play a Dwarf in real life.

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u/Indy12 Jul 13 '15

What can I say, I like the game. And I tend not to post outside of that sub, so I imagine my history must be pretty dnd heavy.

3

u/gunnersgottagun Jul 14 '15

Aren't some of the forms of it homozygous lethal too? (I think actually achondroplasia is). So even more of a reason why, from a purely genetics standpoint, reproducing with a person without dwarfism would be easier.

6

u/funke42 Jul 13 '15

normal people

Is that a phrase you often use? I'm not judging; I'm just surprised. I don't think I've ever heard a minority call the majority "normal" before.

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u/Indy12 Jul 13 '15

Well, my condition is an abnormality, so I don't have a problem using the term "normal" for people without it. I know a lot of other people tend to use "average" instead, and I'll flip between the two, but don't really have a preference.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15

By dating another dwarf, you are only increasing the odds of your children having a disability as well.

I thought about it when I saw Warwick Davis's family. I mean no insult but I don't believe anyone would ever choose dwarfism if they were given the option. I have a problem with people who have children knowing there is great chance or even certainty that they'll be handicapped or have dwarfism. Am I so bad?

2

u/mcac Jul 14 '15

You can still live a pretty normal life with many forms of dwarfism. I don't see why we should be policing who you're allowed to marry based on it.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15 edited Jul 15 '15

When did I say anything about marriage? I'm talking about them having children knowing they will most likely be dwarfs. I'm not saying we should even consider banning it but this issue shouldn't be dismissed so easily.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15

[deleted]

2

u/alcide170 Jul 14 '15

if there was some miracle drug that let me be tall, I wouldn't take it

What if there was this fortune telling machine or something that let you be an adult Tom Hanks for a little while, would you do that?

2

u/chutupandtakemykarma Jul 14 '15

I have an honest question. You just referred to dwarfism as a disability, while others insist it is not. Is this stance to create a sense of empowerment, or do both viewpoints have strong arguments to back their definition?

2

u/Indy12 Jul 14 '15

While I don't like to think of myself as disabled, I also can't ignore the fact that there are a large amount of physical activities that I either can't do, or a have a difficult time with. I know my own limits, but I won't let others set them for me. You can admit to having a disability without letting it define you, and without using it as a crutch. I think empowerment comes from overcoming your disability, not by ignoring it or pretending it doesn't exist.

4

u/[deleted] Jul 13 '15

*dominant, not dominate. Sorry it makes me twitch.

-4

u/Nekotography Jul 13 '15

I'm an experienced 18 year old Dominate looking for a sub who wants a Master to train her to achieve her potential as a 24/7 slave...

1

u/FicklePickle13 Jul 14 '15

No, still wrong there.

1

u/Nekotography Jul 14 '15

About? That's just the usual context for use of the word dominate - a shitty joke, perhaps but hardly "wrong ".

1

u/ToxicApe Jul 14 '15

Not trying to be a smart ass, but just because I'm taller than you does not make me "normal people" :)
Both you and op make interesting points though. Thanks for the vivid discussion!

1

u/Karl_Marx_ Jul 14 '15

You guys should kiss.

0

u/Ask_A_Sadist Jul 13 '15

You are normal my friend. Stop referring to others as normal as though you are not

0

u/JRSHAW7576 Jul 14 '15

Brad Williams is my favorite dwarf

-1

u/many_cuffs Jul 14 '15

Dwarfism is uncommon, but not abnormal. Please don't suggest that you are not a "normal" person!

4

u/ThirdFloorGreg Jul 14 '15

Dwarfism is absolutely abnormal.

0

u/Wolligepoes Jul 14 '15

A normal person in a not really normal body

-1

u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15

This may come off wrong, but do you (and other dwarves) actually date non-dwarfs? I just can't imagine anyone I know actually dating a dwarf.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 14 '15

I just can't imagine anyone I know actually dating a dwarf.

That's social stigma at work. I can imagine people wanting to date dwarves (if nothing else, fetishes) but refraining from it because they're worried what others will think or say. Some people will think you're a pedophile.

-3

u/hahachodeboy Jul 14 '15

dwarfs shouldnt have any kids so they dont spread the gene

2

u/FicklePickle13 Jul 14 '15

Well, that didn't take long. Hello Eugenics Man!

1

u/seedanrun Jul 14 '15 edited Jul 14 '15

OUCH! Pretty harsh. I mean telling a person they should skip probably the greatest experience in life because they could pass on a genetic disadvantage. You could use the same logic to dissuade the color-blind from having kids.

I can see the value to not passing on the gene -- you want your kid to have all the advantages possible in life. Are there any genetic ways to still have children but lower/eliminate the chance they get the Darwinism gene?