r/AskReddit 1d ago

What stop you from killing yourself?

2.8k Upvotes

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321

u/IDONTKNOWPICKLES 1d ago edited 1d ago

When I was 15 my brother found my suicide note. He came to me crying and he said " do you know what will happen to us if you kys? I will never go to college, get a good job, or get married because I will probably just stay home and be with our sad parents, dad will probably die young and heartbroken, mom will never forgive herself, thinking she was the reason, and our dog will always look for you" Him saying that to me made me realize how selfish I was being. People love me and their lives would be forever changed for the worse if I had done it. I never thought about suicide again.

So next time you're thinking "me killing my self will be better for everyone", You couldn't be more wrong and it's actually the opposite. You're burning down the village as you walk away.

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u/Historical-Review435 1d ago

… this hit hard

12

u/Cielmerlion 1d ago

I find this interesting. It was never about other people , it was about me. Not that it will be better for everyone but that I can finally rest. Skip the suffering to the inevitable end of the book.

41

u/therealharrydubois 1d ago

"Suicide isnt painless, if you leave everyone in pain"

10

u/DragoonDM 1d ago

and our dog will always look for you

Why did this one hit me harder than the ones about your other family members?

7

u/-Kullervousti- 1d ago

because dogs don't understand why you left them.

2

u/DragoonDM 23h ago

True, probably that. Same sense of loss, but without the tools to potentially work through the grief like humans can.

18

u/thalo616 1d ago

Not if you have no one and everyone hates you.

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u/Its_da_boys 1d ago

And it also doesn’t resolve the pain that drives someone to do something like this in the first place. If you’re using it hate every waking moment of your life and want to end the suffering only to be called selfish for thinking about it, it only adds insult to injury

5

u/thalo616 23h ago

Exactly. People should have the right to end their lives, and the people in their lives should respect it. Demanding they endure the torture of living to spare others a little grief is actually selfish.

1

u/Drand_Galax 5h ago

Is that really true or is your perception of reality kinda altered? We all have thoughts that most of the time are lies and noticing it is difficult.

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u/thalo616 4h ago

My life is the product of my behavior and ways of thinking. I’m self aware enough to know that I’m the reason why my life sucks and I understand why people hate me. I just don’t care. Maybe I’m too old to give af anymore, but I definitely stopped trying at a certain point and I can only blame myself. I am an absolutely miserable sack of shit that only spreads negativity and brings people down. Oh well.

If I do end myself, I can take comfort in knowing no one will notice, let alone care. I have no family or friends and I’m in constant physical Pain from multiple diseases that I struggle to control and also ensures that I’m always broke thanks to my country’s for profit healthcare industry. I’m just afraid of how painful it could be to actually kill myself. If I ever discover a method that is literally guaranteed to be painless, well, no one will have to deal with my bs anymore

1

u/Drand_Galax 3h ago

But why are u sure people hate you? 😭 explain with examplesss, u don't seem bad plus u are self aware

1

u/thalo616 3h ago

Well I ruined Thanksgiving in 2023 by getting wasted and ranting about depression and homeless people and how it’s all a choice to avoid taking responsibility for their lives. I was so obnoxious to everyone that I was kicked out by my cousin and she won’t speak to me now.

I’m on tons of drugs and can’t get through life without them. Yet I work everyday with heavy machinery and out people at risk.

My brother married into wealth and was basically given millions and doesn’t need to work or do anything and is living his dream and I tons him how unfair I think that is when I’m struggling and get no help in life and therefore cut him out of my life. He’s still trying to talk to me but fuck him.

I once hid in my ex gf’scloset tospy on her and it turns out she was cheating.

I’m definitely not a good person. I rant on here all the time often to annoy and inflame. Idc anymore because either way, I know I’m not gonna be around much longer. Intentionally or not. I’m on steroids that are slowly turning my bones into brittle and most of my teeth are falling out. I really hope I can find a way out soon.

1

u/Drand_Galax 3h ago

Well, see? Not a bad person and not everyone hates u, the one who hates u is yourself but why? Because u feel guilty and ashamed of some things u did, do u think your ex gf feels guilty? Doubt it, so she's already a worse person than u, you feel guilty because you don't really want to hurt people or annoy them which makes your true values the ones of a good person.

Your brother still trying to contact you proves my point, because if he truly hated you he wouldn't even try anymore, and shows he cares a bit and would mourn you if u died, heck he might even help you :P but you refuse because you think you don't deserve it. Am I right?

1

u/thalo616 3h ago

I’m not doing my shittiness justice. I suggest you stop wasting your time. My brother is just trying to placate his own guilty feelings and doesn’t really care. Fuck my ex, whatever. I’m just sick of the pain. Anyway bye

1

u/Drand_Galax 2h ago

It's no justice 😭 Can't know what your brother thinks without actually talking to him, u are mind-reading and we know no one knows how to do that, so not true❗

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u/BohortCestSaCousine 23h ago

That's a powerful message and I hope everyone will get struck by it.

However, this is not always the case. Downvote me if you want people, but having thought about it, I do not see anyone missing me/being affected long term by it when it will happen.

Sure, some people will be like "oh?!". But life will move on, people will carry on, and in a few months, they'll be like "bohort who?".

2

u/y81604 21h ago

the comment really struck me but yep, it doesn't apply to everyone. so im staying for a while until the time it will be the case for me (unlikely)

1

u/creativesc1entist 16h ago

I thought the same for myself and let me tell you that loving people do come into your life and they change you completely.

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u/alanfitz84 22h ago

This one got me..

1

u/lettingeverybodydown 8h ago

I got a solution to that, kill your loved ones first to save them the heartbreak ;)

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u/romano_cheez 22h ago

As much as people hate to hear it, think about it, or even say it, suicide is an extremely selfish act. 

I have never been "suicidal" myself due to my faith and also being raised on how much of an impact it leaves on others, plus my precious cat. However, I've been so low and number and empty in my life and have before not cared if I were to die, which is extremely out of character for me. So I cannot say in consolation that I understand suicidal people, but in ways I do. I guess I understand where they're coming from, even if I wouldn't put myself in that spot. A cocktail of meds makes it easier to function, too 

To anyone considering suicide, please stay. There is  s o m e t h i n g  here on this earth that will be effected by it and most likely you truly do have many people who love and care appt you that you would be permanently damaging. So many reasons to stay, God has you here and you're still alive for a very important reason. Who knows, maybe you're somebody's will to live. Things will be okay, one day

9

u/brooksact 20h ago

Demanding that people endure extreme pain so you don't feel sad is selfish. Fuck off with this shit dude.

-5

u/romano_cheez 15h ago

Ah so you speak to extremely depressed people in a caddish way to make yourself feel better. It's okay for someone to say they felt selfish for wanting to take their life, but agreeing with that despite not wanting to kill myself is somehow the worst thing. Trying to convince people they are important and have left a mark in many people's life and are loved, and to not kill themselves is selfish, gotcha! :)